auntblabby
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Gender: Male
Posts: 114,514
Location: the island of defective toy santas
08 Mar 2021, 3:53 pm
08 Mar 2021, 4:33 pm
kraftiekortie wrote:
I didn't understand the concept of "relying on other people" until I was a teenager. I didn't know what that meant. I was too "into" myself.
When I was a kid, I was totally confused about life and myself and wasn't in a position to be independent.
kraftiekortie wrote:
I got lucky a few times with people. When I had no home, some friend took me in, and allowed me to look for an apartment. It wasn't obligatory--he wouldn't have been less of a friend had he refused. I was lucky he didn't refuse, though.
I was supported by a lot of people, over my life, despite my shortcomings.
kraftiekortie wrote:
I don't believe in "obligation," whatsoever. I'm not "obligated" to do anything for anybody. And nobody is obligated to do anything for me.
I'm the same.
Moreso these days.
kraftiekortie wrote:
I feel like most people care about others at a certain level----but usually don't want to allow other people to upset their routine.
There are "true altruists" out there. I don't fit that category. I'm more into the "enlightened self-interest" thing without being bitchy about it. I believe in treating people like I want to be treated.
There are "true altruists" out there. I don't fit that category. I'm more into the "enlightened self-interest" thing without being bitchy about it. I believe in treating people like I want to be treated.
I am a considerate person, but I emphatically resist taking on an altruistic mindset.
08 Mar 2021, 4:37 pm
auntblabby wrote:
each of us must choose a person for whom this statement is the truth. otherwise, what are we all here for?
As I have said, the only person you can truly depend on is yourself.
auntblabby
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Joined: 12 Feb 2010
Gender: Male
Posts: 114,514
Location: the island of defective toy santas
08 Mar 2021, 4:47 pm
Pepe wrote:
auntblabby wrote:
each of us must choose a person for whom this statement is the truth. otherwise, what are we all here for?
As I have said, the only person you can truly depend on is yourself.
that is what the righties WANT you to believe, that it's every man for himself and the devil take the hindmost. but people have helped me and i have helped them, and paid things forward. that is why we are here on this earth.
08 Mar 2021, 4:55 pm
auntblabby wrote:
Pepe wrote:
auntblabby wrote:
each of us must choose a person for whom this statement is the truth. otherwise, what are we all here for?
As I have said, the only person you can truly depend on is yourself.
that is what the righties WANT you to believe, that it's every man for himself and the devil take the hindmost. but people have helped me and i have helped them, and paid things forward. that is why we are here on this earth.
As I have said, many people have supported me in my lifetime.
Unfortunately, there have also been many people feigning friendship, only to turn on me when it was perceived I was most vulnerable.
I have trust issues for good reasons.
Hence, my preference in predominantly expecting no genuine support, but pleased if it manifests.
08 Mar 2021, 4:57 pm
Have actually asked people in the past not to say this to me. Cause , I take everything so literally, it becomes crushing when you actually ask someone to be there emotionally or otherwise. Then they add insult to the fire by saying after the fact . “ Well why didn’t you call me “ . When you can clearly feel the hollowness of the statement.
It’s like having them tear your heart out , when all your other hopes have been dashed . 
Sorry to be so sceptical .
Can truleyhope for the ideas Auntblabby has written
auntblabby
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Joined: 12 Feb 2010
Gender: Male
Posts: 114,514
Location: the island of defective toy santas
08 Mar 2021, 4:59 pm
08 Mar 2021, 5:01 pm
08 Mar 2021, 5:08 pm
auntblabby
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Joined: 12 Feb 2010
Gender: Male
Posts: 114,514
Location: the island of defective toy santas
08 Mar 2021, 5:08 pm
08 Mar 2021, 5:26 pm
Jakki wrote:
Have actually asked people in the past not to say this to me. Cause , I take everything so literally, it becomes crushing when you actually ask someone to be there emotionally or otherwise. Then they add insult to the fire by saying after the fact . “ Well why didn’t you call me “ . When you can clearly feel the hollowness of the statement.
It’s like having them tear your heart out , when all your other hopes have been dashed .
Sorry to be so sceptical .
Can truleyhope for the ideas Auntblabby has written
It’s like having them tear your heart out , when all your other hopes have been dashed .
Sorry to be so sceptical .
Can truleyhope for the ideas Auntblabby has written
It is predominantly an NT thing, imo.
I have learnt from it and take a rather cynical attitude when I hear something like that.
08 Mar 2021, 5:29 pm
carryon_kate wrote:
I'm here for you is full of crap. People say it over and over but they never really mean it. When you're actually struggling they ignore you. They only want the masking version of you, and to be frank it is upsetting.
When I say "I will be your friend always if you want me to be", I mean it.
Autistic people are known for their loyalty, well, usually.
08 Mar 2021, 5:32 pm
auntblabby wrote:
Jakki wrote:
auntblabby wrote:
each of us must choose a person for whom this statement is the truth. otherwise, what are we all here for?
Likes this statement and hopes for the truth of it .
at the very least, it helps me be able to face myself in the mirror and sleep at night.
Agreed.
Personal integrity, self-confidence and self-esteem are the keys to coping, in a rather hostile life system.
08 Mar 2021, 6:59 pm
08 Mar 2021, 7:14 pm
auntblabby wrote:
Jakki wrote:
auntblabby wrote:
each of us must choose a person for whom this statement is the truth. otherwise, what are we all here for?
Likes this statement and hopes for the truth of it .
at the very least, it helps me be able to face myself in the mirror and sleep at night.
Exactly.
08 Mar 2021, 7:31 pm
