the_incident
Raven
Joined: 23 Sep 2007
Age: 48
Gender: Male
Posts: 110
Location: United States of America
26 Sep 2007, 6:42 pm
DejaQ wrote:
the_incident wrote:
I wouldn't necessarily think it's creepy. However, I can almost guarantee some people will. Prepare yourself for some no-responses and try not to take it as a rejection.
Well, if I don't get a response, I'll be left thinking about what went wrong for months. There's one guy I know how to contact online...I actually handed him a note in real life about six months ago and never got a response, and I'm still wondering what happened (Was he just not interested? Do I seem too creepy / loony / pathetic? Should the note have been less than three paragraphs? Did he know that I was sitting at the same table as that bunch of jerks during lunch?) It took me all my courage just to leave a freaking piece of paper on his desk that one time, and I don't want to risk something like that happening again (that, or a restraining order
).the_incident wrote:
On a side note, sending somebody a friend request on Myspace is completely innocuous. It's about on the same level as slightly inclining your head and saying 'sup as somebody walks by.
Leaning my head and saying "'sup" is just as difficult, if not harder, because I don't have two hours to look at it on paper / a computer monitor.
Right, but what I meant is that in terms of creepiness they're about on the same level, meaning nobody would think twice about it if you did that to somebody you didn't already know well.
I'm wondering about the note you left for your classmate. It's none of my business and I won't judge you either way, but were you trying to ask him out or just be friendly? What did the note say? Either way, I think it's pretty clear if he didn't respond to the note he's not interested. Handing a note to a guy you just want to hang out with in a straight way is probably going to make him think you're gay (which would probably weird out most straight guys, and possibly some gay ones too). Again, I'm not judging you in any way, just trying to understand your situation.
26 Sep 2007, 6:55 pm
the_incident wrote:
I'm wondering about the note you left for your classmate. It's none of my business and I won't judge you either way, but were you trying to ask him out or just be friendly? What did the note say? Either way, I think it's pretty clear if he didn't respond to the note he's not interested. Handing a note to a guy you just want to hang out with in a straight way is probably going to make him think you're gay (which would probably weird out most straight guys, and possibly some gay ones too). Again, I'm not judging you in any way, just trying to understand your situation.
Well, I had kind of a crush on him, but I tried not to suggest it (I'm pretty sure he's openly gay, although I'm kind of quiet about my pansexuality). Basically the note said that I have a difficult time talking to people, and gave him some contact info in case he wanted to arrange to meet during lunch or something. I ended saying something like "By the way, I'm Dan, that geek who sits near the window. If you don't want to talk, thanks for at least listening". I had to write about three different drafts before I wrote one that I liked, and I racked up all my nerves to slip it onto his seat while he was up and trying to seem like I was just passing. I got out of class as quickly as I could when the bell rang.
the_incident
Raven
Joined: 23 Sep 2007
Age: 48
Gender: Male
Posts: 110
Location: United States of America
26 Sep 2007, 8:50 pm
26 Sep 2007, 9:10 pm
the_incident
Raven
Joined: 23 Sep 2007
Age: 48
Gender: Male
Posts: 110
Location: United States of America
27 Sep 2007, 12:46 pm
juliekitty wrote:
I don't think there's anything wrong with friending these people on MySpace.
I would just send a friend request without text. Then, if they add you, say hi!
I would just send a friend request without text. Then, if they add you, say hi!
I still think this is a great suggestion. You don't have to worry about how you sound, and nobody is going to think it's weird or creepy.
But it sounds like you've already talked yourself out of it.
Well, good luck either way!
