"Nice to meet you" and other odd social customs

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Ah yes, the strange unspoken formalisms of 'polite' interaction that don't make much sense.

Questions that are obviously open-ended, that nonetheless demand a response from an agreed (though never formally explicitly stated), narrow and enumerated range of possible answers.

When I was far younger, I would often flout convention by responding in uncircumproscribed ways to clichèd questions such as "how are you?".

One favourite is when, in a street scenario, someone asks "Have you got a problem?" (meaning that they are angling for a brawl or a punch up), is to answer "Yes, I do have a problem - I can't get Bind to work properly on my Linux server; I can't seem to configure Apache properly for X, Y or Z and I seem to have several XML parsing Perl module smissing".

This is not 'best survival strategy', but I so often can't help but defy the conventional protocls and received wisdoms.

This used to be far worse when I was younger, over the last 20 or so years, I have tended to be 'conditioned' to emitting the 'correct' (ie socially permisslbe) responses, due to the problems encountered when I do react that way I so often want to.

I have a problem with "I'll talk to you later." I find myself saying this even if I'll never get a chance to speak with that person again. Compliments just stump me, especially when the one complimenting me is the person interviewing me for a job. "Thank you" never seems to be enough of a response.

I don't see this as a problem. I always say "see ya" or "later" to someone, even if I won't. I justify it this way: I'll see them again in the next life, or in Heaven, or upon attaining Nirvana, or whatever comes next.

When I sneeze and people say "Bless you." I respond with, "Too late!" They usually don't catch on, the simpletons, but if they ask, "Whaddya mean too late?" I answer with, "It's too late: my soul escaped."

I never say "see ya" or "later" myself. I used to, but then I had to be in the control of someone who hurt me. I wished every day that I wouldn't "see them later" and couldn't bring myself even to say it as an empty politeness. "Have a good day," and "Good bye" is about all I can manage these days.

When meeting people an adult for the first time I always say "Hello.Nice to meet you." just to be polite.When meeting somone around my age group I say"Hey."When metting a younger kid for the first time,I say "Hi______(insert first name here)".If they havn't told me thier name,I just ask them.

I don't have a problem with "yo" but when a boy just comes up to you and says'Hey,yo,how's it hangin'?"I find that rather odd.

My co-worker says nice to meet you is anticipation that it is a nice person. You don't say nice to know you, if the person turns out to be a sociopath.

Hand shaking yes is a way of indicating safety, but why do people want to hug you? Or touch your shoulder? I HATE THAT! When I am doing my job as a crisis worker, people sometimes will hug me after I have met with them, sometimes less than an hour. Yes, I helped them, but does that give them the right to touch me? I guess they think they are reinforcing the connection. They don't know that by the next day I will have forgotten what they look like and often also their name.

And now that I am preaching, how about smiling when you meet someone? I think it is freaky to show someone your teeth when you are trying to make them like you. For most sentient creatures showing teeth is a sign of aggression and domination. Does that mean when I don't grin back the other person thinks they have an advantage over me?

Hmmm....

I give a light smile (no teeth) to indicate that I'm not being hostile. I also understand that it's just plain polite. You appear happy to meet someone new!

I mean, how nice could you possibly seem to be if you introduce yourself with a frown? Not very nice at all...

I shake hands, but not to show I'm not armed or no threat, but because that way, I can show I AM a threat, if threatained (squeeze hands )

Brillient.