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To make a long story short, she said I was talking down to her, being very intellectually arrogant, and making her feel stupid for the latter comment.
WTF???? How is that being intellectually arrogant?
This is how it works. You're discussing something rather intellectual with her, you're treating her like an equal. However, you lose her with a couple of the $2 words. She feels stupid and then blames you for it. She decides you were competing with her. Who knows, maybe she was trying to sound smart and getting competitive?
I get accused of this in my own illiterate family and I, in turn, accuse my husband of this when I'm feeling insecure. Hopefully, I remember that he is not talking down but is treating my like an equal when he gets like that. He has learned to speak appropriately to people who aren't so smart. So, I know better but sometimes insecurity makes me paranoid. I guarantee you that's her problem.