Win friends and earn respect by being a jerk?

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This remind me with my fault .
I'v been changed my personality, because want to helping the others .And now ,my image ruined (become very bad ,fake,stupid person because of this).And be number one enemy for this two side.
It's very contradiction, if I didnt do this they will attacking each other and I'm an older person in there (try to made the situation cooler and didn't try to choose one side ),even they didn't think so.