does asperger's get better as you get older?

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Yes and No. I always found it easier to talk to adults when I was a child. They had already had enough life experience that they were able to better tolerate my way of thinking, had more knowledge about subjects I liked, were not as prone to school social rules, etc. I was bullied pretty much from Kindergarten to 10th grade. Even when I was in high school, I was known to be a nerd. I usually only had one or two friends. I didn't like to do the things my other friends did, because they liked being in big groups and going to parties. These were and still are VERY hard for me to deal with. Now that I am an adult, I find it harder to come across friends. My neighbors just moved, and it has become apparent that I was not their "friend" but rather an acquaintance. They were just trying to be good neighbors. They had no or little interest in being my friend, in a close type of way. I think we find a lot more acquaintances than we do real friends along our journeys. I tend to have one good friend that I do things with, and then when they leave I find myself alone again. However, I always find someone along the way that becomes my one friend again. I do, however find that most of my friends are very pushy, and most people can't stand them. I can, because I am more laid back and just enjoy having someone else to talk to.

I have been told that I have "opened up" a bit socially by a few people. My gf has especially noticed that my skills with people have improved somewhat drastically over the past few years. I think this change has to do with me figuring out that I like to make friends if they meet a loose criteria. Although, if they don't meet a few qualifications I quickly dismiss them, and won't give them another chance. I absolutely can NOT tolerate people who don't meet my qualifications for friendship. My insides feel like they are in a pressure cooker when I'm around them.

Besides that, there are some traits of mine that seem to be getting worse as I age. The anxiety and depression have more severe moments, and cycle more frequently. This may be partly due to my not knowing what I want to do with my life (career-wise), and starting to panic about it since I'm three years into my thirties at this point. I'm getting those looks of "omg really you don't know what you want to do yet?! !?" from family and friends, and that makes me panicky. Also, I'm not sure what sort of "role model" that makes me to my daughter.

Overall I think it definitely gets better over time. There are peaks and valleys though for me, and some bad and good parts that grow at the same time.

On the one hand, I keep learning more and more information from which to draw upon, and that's going to keep happening for my entire life. I'm also learning more and more about how my brain works, and can channel it. I know more about my gifts and limitations, and am learning how to draw boundaries.

On the other hand, there are difficulties navigating the adult world that weren't there when I was younger. I was never good at playing school politics, but I didn't need to in order to get good grades. But in the adult world, the inability to play office politics can get you fired. It's also frustrating to realize there are stuff I am just plain bad at.

But it's wonderful to realize just how gifted I am, and now I'm able to cultivate those gifts. Long term I definitely think it gets better with age. I expect to keep growing my entire life; I think a lot of people just settle into who they are at an earlier age.

In some ways it gets worse, and in others it gets better.

I am about to turn 39 and I have definitely learned how to act in social situations, how to make small talk, etc. But this is largely done by mimicking others and takes conscious effort. I actually have a lot of friends and most think I am a cool guy, but when I am not making a conscious effort, when I am being my true, aspie, self, things can get a little strange and awkward both for myself and for others. Plus, you are expected to do things and say things in such a manner that is second nature or "common knowledge" to NTs, which makes my aspergers seem way out there and odd to them.

Though the Asperger's itself hasn't changed, my ability to cope with it has, and every day I learn new skills with which to improve my experience in this world, and my ability to navigate social settings. There are still days when I become suddenly aware of my disability though, like somebody has stripped me of my clothes and turned on all the lights!

My AS has gotten better as I grew up. Same for ADHD.

It's hard to say. The challenges of being a child on the spectrum are different from those of being an adult on the spectrum. I find that navigating adult life with autism is a lot more complex and multilayered. Of course, when I was younger I thought that my experiences back then were also very complex.

As a child, I had my parents to help me make friends, and I didn't really feel the need to fit in. I did okay at school academically. I sometimes wanted to be more popular, but throughout my school career, I was ultimately comfortable keeping to myself and being seen as "weird".

But as an adult, I need to integrate more into a society. As an adult, I need to actively find a way to fit into a role-not just try to retreat into myself. I have to find a job-I don't have a choice in that respect. I have to be able to form an independent life. These are challenges of necessity. You can opt out of a lot of things when you're young, but as an adult there's no getting around the need to integrate into society.

I find that symptoms show up in different ways, although I think I'm more well-adjusted now than I was as a child, I may find it equally hard to find a place in the world.

I believe I've gotten much better with age - but I'm not myself - by better I mean I can mimic those I find socially gifted enough to seem 'normal' - when I tell people I have AS these days no one believes me.

I would love to be myself and be accepted, but I haven't found a role in life I can fit that into - with the exception of my family - after all this time they finally understand what AS is and who I am.

I would say that if you're young and have AS, just keep at it - don't use AS an excuse to not have the life you want - it does get better, but how much better is entirely up to you.

In my experience Asperger's definitely does get easier as you get older. For a start, the older you get the broader your vocab becomes, so you find yourself able to explain problems that you couldn't explain when younger.

Am example for me is that I always feared drama lessons at school. I can tell you now it was because I feared I might be asked to act in a way that was incongruent with my own persona - yet when I was 12 I could not have explained that because I didn't know the word 'congruent.'

Also when it comes to socialising I consider Asperger's to be a developmental delay when it. You do develop socially but at a slower rate than everyone else, but hopefully as you get older you have are able to catch up with your peers. This is definitely my experience.

Pretty sure it does, as long as your willing to commit yourself to change.

As you get older you learn to decode other people's emotions better. You also learn how to do social things that just grow out of the instincts of Herd People. That makes a ton of difference.

Kids in social groups are establishing their identities. They all worry about fitting in to some degree. They all instinctively help each other to fit in. Part of the education about fitting in is punishment for being different by the group. That's a good thing when the punishment is for something like being too selfish, the punished kid learns from it, and the group doesn't throw him out forever. Of course it's a bad thing when the punished kid is being punished for something he can't do anything about or shouldn't have to do anything about if he could.

Social groups punish less and less as the members get older and have established their identities.