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Not Interested in Guessing Games

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ladyelaine
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12 May 2018, 7:44 pm

Summer_Twilight wrote:
It came to me LadyElaine why those people want to keep you as their friend on Facebook and as a contact.

1. Maybe as a back up in case their other "Close" friends within their friend proximity aren't available so they go to the next outer ring that you are in so it's convenient to them
2. Because they think you will be there for them because you have something they want

However, something else to keep in mind when people play these guessing games:
1. Those people who you probably see could be others that have something in common with such children of the same age, be part of a certain group like you might be hetero and they could be LGBT
2.They might like you but may not be interested in your interests or activities
3.All the money they don't have could have been saved for the things they do with the other people


Some people are friend collectors and like to have as many people in their friends list as possible.

I don't have anything that anyone would want. People tend to only come around when their popular friends aren't available to help them out.



HistoryGal
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12 May 2018, 7:49 pm

Guessing games are not appropriate. Just say you are not interested. I've done it and tactfully.

Why these people do this to Elaine? Yeah as she is a reserve person. Eff that. Nobody likes that feeling.



HistoryGal
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12 May 2018, 7:52 pm

Some people are indeed friend collectors and I refuse to add anyone like that.



Summer_Twilight
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13 May 2018, 8:17 am

I had my share of guessing games and I am not saying it's right that they treat people like that. I myself don't like it when they don't make time for us because they have more in common with person B because they happen to share more in common. Say, move away and go to the same college and just seem to bond with different people while throwing you away.

I was friends with someone like that who I met at a social group for young adults with AS and she did things with me. Then she moved to a vocational school and never had time for me after that and seemed to lead me on. "Unfortunately, I have such and such to do." Yet she made time for everyone else but my friends and I unless it was convenient for her. She also seemed to pull this when she had a boyfriend other than a close male friend.

The funny thing with her is that she didn't get it whenever I would call her on the carpet and she would respond with a very emotionally abusive immature tone. "I got you last letter and I did not appreciate that. If you can't respect the fact that I have a busy schedule then consider the relationship over." :lol: Then she would calm down and soothe things over with excuses. "I know you are mad at me but I am on army time.



HistoryGal
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13 May 2018, 8:48 am

NTs do this to each other all the time in their quest to have only the cream of the crop as friends. It's acceptable and promoted in our culture. Books are written about this Power Socializing.

I just chose not to be used. Wish I had chosen sooner.



Summer_Twilight
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13 May 2018, 10:00 am

HistoryGal wrote:
NTs do this to each other all the time in their quest to have only the cream of the crop as friends. It's acceptable and promoted in our culture. Books are written about this Power Socializing.

I just chose not to be used. Wish I had chosen sooner.


They call this "Social Climbing." Actually, I have seen a number of Aspies who are extroverts and interverts who are social climbers like that treat others like crap.



Summer_Twilight
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13 May 2018, 2:08 pm

I just found this and it fits perfectly with the guessing games but check out this video might explain the guessing games are really a form of a one-sided friendship.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Rpv_Sz8Qq9w



HistoryGal
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13 May 2018, 3:45 pm

In the old days, it was called social climbing and thought of as crass.

These days, they write books about this behavior and rebrand it as power socializing.

Very sh!tt!You know to treat people like that.



HistoryGal
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13 May 2018, 3:48 pm

Trust me....I know what guessing games and friendships look like.

I doubt that ASD have the panache to pull it off. Remember lots of people out there call themselves ASD to excuse their nasty behavior. At some point, a person is just a bumhole.....



Summer_Twilight
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14 May 2018, 9:57 am

HistoryGal wrote:
Trust me....I know what guessing games and friendships look like.

I doubt that ASD have the panache to pull it off. Remember lots of people out there call themselves ASD to excuse their nasty behavior. At some point, a person is just a bumhole.....



I agree with you because I have been more and more of it all the time and they not just nasty they are mean and think they know it all. They also act like the world revolves around them because they are special and make others miserable. Why they are so bad that they think they don't need to learn social skills because they think it's a way to cure autism. BS!



ladyelaine
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14 May 2018, 10:43 am

Summer_Twilight wrote:
HistoryGal wrote:
Trust me....I know what guessing games and friendships look like.

I doubt that ASD have the panache to pull it off. Remember lots of people out there call themselves ASD to excuse their nasty behavior. At some point, a person is just a bumhole.....



I agree with you because I have been more and more of it all the time and they not just nasty they are mean and think they know it all. They also act like the world revolves around them because they are special and make others miserable. Why they are so bad that they think they don't need to learn social skills because they think it's a way to cure autism. BS!


Some parents never bother to teach their children social skills. They think their children can't learn social skills because of their autism. Others constantly tell their children that they are perfect and better than everyone else. They side with their kids even when they are in the wrong.

It makes life harder for those who really have autism when people go around using autism to excuse their crappy behavior or explain some quirky thing they do.



Summer_Twilight
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14 May 2018, 11:42 am

ladyelaine wrote:
Summer_Twilight wrote:
HistoryGal wrote:
Trust me....I know what guessing games and friendships look like.

I doubt that ASD have the panache to pull it off. Remember lots of people out there call themselves ASD to excuse their nasty behavior. At some point, a person is just a bumhole.....



I agree with you because I have been more and more of it all the time and they not just nasty they are mean and think they know it all. They also act like the world revolves around them because they are special and make others miserable. Why they are so bad that they think they don't need to learn social skills because they think it's a way to cure autism. BS!


Some parents never bother to teach their children social skills. They think their children can't learn social skills because of their autism. Others constantly tell their children that they are perfect and better than everyone else. They side with their kids even when they are in the wrong.

It makes life harder for those who really have autism when people go around using autism to excuse their crappy behavior or explain some quirky thing they do.


On the ones who don't teach social skills because of their beliefs that their child is broken usually are the ones who get put on the defense when anyone tries to let them know that their child needs to learn social skills they turn into bears.

"Get away from my kid and don't ever contact me again."



ladyelaine
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14 May 2018, 12:18 pm

Summer_Twilight wrote:
ladyelaine wrote:
Summer_Twilight wrote:
HistoryGal wrote:
Trust me....I know what guessing games and friendships look like.

I doubt that ASD have the panache to pull it off. Remember lots of people out there call themselves ASD to excuse their nasty behavior. At some point, a person is just a bumhole.....



I agree with you because I have been more and more of it all the time and they not just nasty they are mean and think they know it all. They also act like the world revolves around them because they are special and make others miserable. Why they are so bad that they think they don't need to learn social skills because they think it's a way to cure autism. BS!


Some parents never bother to teach their children social skills. They think their children can't learn social skills because of their autism. Others constantly tell their children that they are perfect and better than everyone else. They side with their kids even when they are in the wrong.

It makes life harder for those who really have autism when people go around using autism to excuse their crappy behavior or explain some quirky thing they do.


On the ones who don't teach social skills because of their beliefs that their child is broken usually are the ones who get put on the defense when anyone tries to let them know that their child needs to learn social skills they turn into bears.

"Get away from my kid and don't ever contact me again."


Some of these parents are too busy putting their sex lives before their children's well being and education.



Summer_Twilight
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14 May 2018, 6:55 pm

LadyElaine,
There are also parents of autistic children with lots of money who have the nerve to squander money on what could be spent on their children getting services and other investments. Rather they squander it on materialistic items and other things and half of the time they leave their child out of things.



ladyelaine
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14 May 2018, 6:58 pm

Summer_Twilight wrote:
LadyElaine,
There are also parents of autistic children with lots of money who have the nerve to squander money on what could be spent on their children getting services and other investments. Rather they squander it on materialistic items and other things and half of the time they leave their child out of things.


Some of these parents spoil their kids and don't make them do anything at school.



HistoryGal
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14 May 2018, 7:10 pm

Lots of money but feces for brains.