17 Toxic Phrases Emotionally Intelligent People Notice

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Wait, what? I hope you aren't worrying about me. Now that I know you actually write words (lol) - I just have to click a button. It takes .5 seconds. No biggy. Carry on however you wish, Fnord!

What??

I am not worried about you (or anyone else); but if you are having difficulty reading my posts, then maybe others are also.

The "Single Most Common Cause" being me, I had to change.

Reading all your replies, I think how we say things is probably the main reason people take things wrongly.

These lists of phrases *can* be helpful but they don't account for tone and body language.

I've noticed that NTs can tell each other to f**k off but if they say it with a smile, the others don't take offence.

I can say good morning to people and they glare and avoid me!

Maybe we need body language and tone lessons

Kitlily, the best way to shut down someone who is toxic is to use phrases like

"I am not going there."

"I am not comfortable talking about this."

"You're making me feel uncomfortable"

If you do use the F word then you get nasty backlash

Those phrases would work in the US, I imagine, but saying them in Britain would just get you laughed at and ridiculed.

It's a shame Brits aren't as enlightened as Americans when it comes to feelings, emotions and when they are crossing someone's boundaries.

How do the Brits set boundaries in the UK?

We don't. Generally if you talk about boundaries to Brits, they will look at you mystified and think you're talking about fences or walls of their garden.

We just ignore emotions, use passive aggression (e.g. do things we don't want to do then b|tch about it behind people's backs), talk about non-difficult subjects like the weather, bottle it all up, keep calm and carry on. Anyone showing emotion is ignored/ glared at until they stop. We are supposed to be calm and polite at all times.

Britons are very emotionally stunted people. That's why drunkenness is so popular here- any emotion that is shown can be explained away by 'I was drunk, I didn't mean it!'

Americans are at least 50 years ahead of Brits in talking about, understanding, accepting emotions and mental health. It's only in the 21st century that concepts like therapy, counselling etc. have been accepted as helpful. Before that, therapy and counselling were laughed at, not talked about due to embarrassment because counselling was seen as only for mad people.

Personally I am very grateful that Americans are so open and understanding about emotions and mental health, they have shown Brits the way ahead.