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pete42
Blue Jay
Blue Jay

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Joined: 8 Feb 2014
Age: 52
Gender: Male
Posts: 93

22 Mar 2014, 4:03 pm

As friends partner off and get married, have kids etc, I've found myself more isolated, and I don't like it. I'm lucky though to live in a big city where there are always things to do to be more sociable.

Meetup.com has been my saviour. There's dozens of options every evening if I want to get out and be with people. It's a bit like joining a social club, but easier I'd say as at every meetup around 50% of the people are there for the first time and don't know anybody, so a simple smile and a "hello, I'm Pete" is enough to get a conversation going with anyone there. Or, if you're not feeling communicative, it's perfectly acceptable to keep yourself to yourself and just listen to the main speaker or whatever the meetup is about.

It's also one of the few environments when it appears to be perfectly OK to walk up to two people having a conversation and listen in, since everyone is partly there to learn things and meet new people.

I've found new business partners and clients at meetups, and even my current "sort-of" girlfriend (my first relationship in over 15 years) at a meetup.

Another option is Toastmasters International. There are meetings in most cities, and you get the added bonus of learning public speaking / communications skills in a very friendly environment.



capri0112
Raven
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Joined: 21 Sep 2006
Age: 55
Gender: Female
Posts: 102
Location: IL, USA

23 Mar 2014, 7:40 am

leafplant wrote:
Point being is I feel happy and relaxed when I am on my own and stressed and anxious when there are people around me. So it's obvious what option I'd go for most of the time.


Exactly how I feel too.

Not that I want to be completely alone all of the time. That is not good for anyone. But I would love to know what it's like to be energized (rather than depleted) from socializing!!


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