Do you think this is true (not for everyone)?

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QFT
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20 Jun 2022, 3:11 am

temp1234 wrote:

One of the lecturers mentioned sexism against men during the lecture. The lecturer was female. She said that a man without a wife or girlfriend in some social situations is seen as a loser as if something were wrong with him, while a woman without a husband or boyfriend is seen as independent and respectable. For example, a work-related party etc where everyone brings a partner with them*. So a woman is socially accepted either way, but a man has to have a female partner to be socially accepted. Maybe this could be a factor making men more desperate for a relationship than women are?

Well, this particular idea is not prejudiced but a fact. Since it’s a woman who does a choosing, logic implies that single woman is picky while single man is a loser.

But this leads to two questions:

1) How did it happen that women to the choosing, given that the number of men and women is roughly the same

2) Since single men are losers why not help them out to get out of their predicament?

QFT
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20 Jun 2022, 3:16 am

kraftiekortie wrote:

The “lonely men sending messages to lonely women” should, if they are “forward in expressing their desires,” seek to be less “forward” in expressing their desires—and instead write to these women things they would write to their friends.

By forward do you mean sexually explicit? If so, then they aren’t so lonely after all, they are just jerks.

I didn’t write messages here on WP, but I wrote plenty of messages on “Christian dating for free” (CDFF). None of them are sexually explicit, yet most of them didn’t get any replies.

jillsurf12
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23 Nov 2023, 4:23 pm

Nope, since I'm from the country on the bios, you can imagine my struggle to have a boyfriend, this country isn't made for non social people even a little lolol.

funeralxempire
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23 Nov 2023, 4:35 pm

jillsurf12 wrote:

Nope, since I'm from the country on the bios, you can imagine my struggle to have a boyfriend, this country isn't made for non social people even a little lolol.

Brazil really does seem like a country that rewards being an extrovert. :skull:

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Edna3362
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24 Nov 2023, 8:27 am

I wonder if this is limited to the west or how much it is also true elsewhere...

I've yet to find out myself -- I need more experience and time around the autistics in my country, at least online.

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NibiruMul
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06 Dec 2023, 6:19 pm

I actually fit neither. I struggle with making friends and I've never been in a relationship.

Stormyweathers
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20 Dec 2023, 2:32 pm

Joe90 wrote:

I don't mean there's a rule or that it's the same for all Aspies, but I have noticed a pattern in my 12 years of being a member on this board.

Males on the spectrum = more likely to have friends, more likely to struggle finding/keeping a romantic relationship

Females on the spectrum = more likely to find/keep a romantic relationship, more likely to struggle with making friends

I hear what you are saying, but have a care for sampling bias. An internet forum is rarely representative of the general population. Moreover, it seems clear from the research that a much larger percentage of females on the spectrum fit in well enough to never be diagnosed ... so why would they be here? Even beyond that, the patterns of how people respond to social stress differ between the genders in a manner that is not proportional to the stress they experience. And, last but not least, the expectations placed upon us in long-term relationships isn't the same between the genders.

With the understanding that the plural of anecdotes is not data, I'm male, married, and might have one friend remaining.

Calyrex
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20 Dec 2023, 2:52 pm

No, I have a hard time finding relationships people tend to like me platonically.
It may be because I appear to be a child.

BillyTree
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20 Dec 2023, 6:21 pm

Joe90 wrote:

Maybe this observation have been covered already in the thread. I am to lazy to read through all posts.
If you assume most people are heterosexuals trying to find a partner of the opposite sex and be friends with people of their own sex. You see that both males and females on the spectrum find it easy to have relationships with male neurotypicals but find it harder with female neurotypicals. Maybe men are more relaxed with people being different and less judgemental about "odd" social behaviour?

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