enamdar wrote:
...then in college there really isn't much social life in class, so its a bit harder, especially after the initial fluid social situation for freshman. But it seems like its impossible to make friends after school. Jobs don't nurture the same sociality. And strangers are cold.
I have absolutely no tried-and-true advice, but although it seems like there is no social life in class in college, that may have to do more with the idea that class and social life are seperate entities in college. In high school, the six to seven hours you spend there are your life, so your social life therefore gets built around classes, lunch, and the like. Odds are the people who you are in class with are good friends out of class... and the social life has just moved to another part of campus.
Most neurotypical types suggest meeting new people at a place like a bookstore or a coffee shop. To me, this seems like a losing strategy, but then maybe there's something other people have that makes it work. A neurotypical friend once was trying to get another of my friends (who's neurotypical, albeit a bit antisocial) to meet new people and those were the places she suggested. But I've never seen random people make conversation at bookstores or coffee shops, and I imagine that in the real world there are hundreds of failures per success. As you say, strangers are cold. So how that is supposed to work baffles me.
That being said, the best advice is that it takes friends to make friends. People are more inclined to meet people they have friends in common with, as it gives a very strong social context.
16 Jun 2009, 11:10 pm
