I'm a weirdo AMONG weirdos!

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I definitely have some symptoms of Asperger's syndrome (though some people who don't know me as well as my family and high school friends do don't seem to think so), but it seems like over the years I've gotten a lot more comfortable socially. Yeah I used to have problems talking on the phone and problems socializing with peers, but now (practically) all of that is gone I realize now that not all NT's are jerks. Some of them definitely are, but a lot of them aren't (keep in mind, though, I've been in college 3 years, so I don't get bullied all that much anymore, unlike what used to happen to me). And I can talk on the phone fine now and have for a long time. I still don't like leaving messages, but when I feel like I absolutely have to leave one, I will.

It seems like a lot of Aspies are nervous about meeting each other in person if they've never done so before (I'm talking here about Aspies who first met online). Though I can understand why that is, I feel no nervousness about meeting such a person (unless, of course, it turns out they're really a creepy old man in disguise ) But if they're not, then I have no problem with wanting to meet them. Does that make me weird among Aspies? It may not sound like I'm Aspie from this post, but if you really got to know me, you'd know that I was Aspie, esp. if you knew me in person.

Despite everything I've said so far, though, I just can't see myself having a relationship (whether it be a close guy friend or more intimate girlfriend) with someone who ISN'T Aspie. "Normal" people are fine, like I said, but it's not like I'd invite them over or anything (one exception, my friend Joel from a Music Appreciation class I took in college, whom I have invited over a couple times). It's just that Aspies provide more a sense of carmaraderie and security for me 'cuz I'm allowed to just be myself in front of them with no qualms. If I tried to pursue a relationship with a "normal" girl, but they heard the way I laugh, or found out that I can't take care of myself like most people my age do, or found out I take medication to quell my "bad" behavior, they'd probably be devastated, which would make me humiliated Why is it, then, that in spite of all my idiosyncrasies that I basically have (next to) no problems socializing?

I've become more accustomed to NT's and their mysterious rituals as the years passed. For me it was a matter of interest. My "special interest", for years has people and how they worked. Now I'm gonna be a shrink : ).
Chalk it up to hyperfocussing into something useful, and the empathy part of your brain and the brains of your peers kicking in.

You sound like me, except I grew up diagnosed, have had an NT boyfriend before, and would be happy to date anyone I took to (NT/AS/whatever). I never hated NT's or thought they were jerks (even when I was younger and badly bullied), and I think most people on the site are the same - but a small minority constantly give us a bad name in that respect.

i always feel as if I'm the oddball. idk