Well, I find myself in a rather awkward place these days. I could consider that I've been extraordinarily lucky - I've had close friends since late highschool, many of them the same, some I've met in early college, met many of their friends which have come and gone, all the while I never really had to strike out too hard on my own to make friends.
Well, one by one they're either having fallings out with each other, moving to other states, and I realize that I've never had to start from scratch. On one side it scares me a little, mainly because the types of NT guys friends I have are very difficult to find, some of them are rather profound social butterflies and for a long time were getting me out to house parties almost every weekend, I was going out with them downtown to the club districts where half their riding buddies (sport bikes) were major somebodies of one type or another, and while all those acquaintances appreciated me they're also people that I either had only so much in common with or on the other side of things they're far too busy managing businesses and what not.
On one side I see myself in a positive position in this sense - my self esteem is greatly healed and rolling strong on the social level, I've gotten so good at adapting to my AS traits that I feel like there's nothing between me and NT except for a few superficial externalities. That said though I also see where more than enough, I'd have to argue a slight 'most' NT's don't have and maybe even never had what I have for the last 10 or 12 years of my life. What I am doing for myself right now - working out on the bowflex, have been for about 18 months straight and have no plan of stopping, am involved now more in martial arts (San Shau, Kali, Muay Thai) where I'm dead set on becoming a black belt and once I get real proficient moving on to BJJ, Sambo, whatever struff I can get my hands on - work my way into that crowd maybe?
The hard thing is though - my friends to this day are people who can also appreciate the music that I'm into. I think it would be rare nigh impossible right now to find friends right off the bat who 1) have themselves together, 2) are edgy and interesting (in crowd-esque but not stupid) and 3) have the same kind of appreciation for things like drum & bass, techno, trip-hop, etc. True, I can spot the right types of people out pretty quick but, these days as you hit your later 20's it seems like starting from scratch gets tougher as everyone seems to be slowly getting eaten up with mortgages, families, long hours at the office, construction, restaurant, you name it.
I guess all I ask, I really hope the best for you guys (for the non atheists here I'll say I pray for ya), just keep your fingers crossed for me and I'll do the same vice a versa.
16 Jul 2009, 9:48 pm
