Does anyone find whiney indecisive people annoying?

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moonnymph
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30 Jan 2010, 3:39 pm

The kind that always talk about their feelings and always want your opinion on everything because they don't know how to make decisions on their own. They come off really lonely and needy.



Last edited by moonnymph on 30 Jan 2010, 5:59 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Lene
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30 Jan 2010, 5:33 pm

I don't know about everything, but I quite like it when people ask my opinion. That said, if someone repeatedly ignores my advice, I do come to the conclusion that all they want is approval for whatever they plan next, and in that case I save my energy and keep my comments as neutral as possible.

It takes a lot of whining to put me off a person. I'd much rather a complainer and whiner than someone who insults me or betrays me.



Elementary_Physics
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30 Jan 2010, 7:18 pm

I know what you mean by indecisive. They say should I do "this" or should I do "that" - and one of the options is always OBVIOUSLY the right thing to do, and its like "Why are you even asking - You know the right answer"



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31 Jan 2010, 3:25 am

I don't find it annoying when people talk about their feelings all the time because apparently it's what most people do. However when people constantly ask my advice about something..."Should I do this or I do that?"...& then do the opposite of whatever answer I give, THAT annoys me.


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b9
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31 Jan 2010, 7:14 am

no they do not annoy me but i do not have an affinity with them.
i can not answer this in a concise way but i will try hard to not get verbose.

i have no opinion of people who whine if they are not whining to me.
some people on this site post threads that talk about how they are sick and tired of all the whining on here, and i can not understand why they are affected.
if i click into a thread and see that it is just a whinge, i back out without reading more than a few words. it has no effect on me.

likewise, if i hear people in real life whining to others, i do not bother to listen, so it also does not effect me.

but people who are on the phone to me or at my place who whinge and whine are a drag. i suppose it annoys me sometimes because they are taking up my time with things i can not help with.

i had 3 friends (now i have one) (not including my girlfriend) , who mainly complained and felt upset all the time.

they would come over, and i would be wanting to talk about neutral things, and they would start whining.

eg 1: a male i still know complains bitterly about how he was treated unfairly at his work and got sacked, and now can not get another job. i will listen to it once, and let him complete all there is to say about it, but he keeps repeating his woes over and over.
what can i do about it? nothing, so i wish he would stop whinging but he persists and i want him to go. he has a flat and is supported by the government with a pension that lasts for life if he can not get a job.

eg 2: a girl called sonia came over often with extreme anger and sadness that she is considered a loser by her sister because she is unemployed and has no kids at 34 years of age. again i have no idea how to help her and i say things like "forget about her. she can not hurt you if you ignore her", but that is not good enough, and she keeps moaning and i see that all we will do that night is talk about her problem which i do not really care about. if my sister disliked me (which she does), i care nothing because i do not have to see her or talk to her. so i can not understand why sonia is so distressed by something that does not matter, and so i can not help. it is a drag.

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however, there is a member here who i genuinely feel very sorry for. i can not mention his name, and he posts very seldom. he said that he was losing his accommodation and would have to find a place to sleep on the streets. he is 48 and he has no job and he has diabetes and his feet are chronically infected. he needs a carer to help him dress his feet with bandages but can afford nothing because he is totally broke with no prospect of a job and no support from anyone.
he usually ends his post with "well gotta go now because my internet time is up" because he is posting from the library as he does not own a computer. that really got to me.

he does not lace his posts with "poor me" inferences or anything. he comes on sometimes and asks if anyone knows of refuges in his area that he maybe able to get a bed in for a few days and something to eat.
he is very unlucky and i feel so sad for him and would like to help him find a warm place out of the cold to sleep in, but i do not live in america.

i am sad for him now and i wonder how he is sleeping lately. he does not complain, he just states his case and asks if anyone can give him advice.

i have exceeded my word limit and i will stop here because i have not said anything of substance anyway.



Miyah
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31 Jan 2010, 8:15 am

I sure do because people like that still need to grow up.



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31 Jan 2010, 7:17 pm

I don't mind hearing another person talk about their feelings. I'd rather listen to that person, than shut them out of my life. I think it's good, when people talk about their feelings. It's nice to know that I'm not the only one, who shows a little bit of emotion.


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FuzzyElephants
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05 Feb 2010, 1:07 pm

Yes, this kind of behaviour can be agrivating after awhile.

I'm not against listening or even being someone's shoulder to cry on but when people put their emotions before logic or continually make stupid choices because they can't see past whatever the problem is then it gets to be very draining to be around them.

And giving sound advice repeatedly only to have it fall on deaf ears is always annoying.



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05 Feb 2010, 6:44 pm

I can be like that at times. Whatcha gonna do about it, homies?