What is socially appropriate in this situation?

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Hi, I'm new to the forum, although actually I've lurked and learned for quite some time. My son has been diagnosed with autism, autism so severe our local school pays for him to attend a private school for disabled children. I had no idea why I always felt like I was on the outside looking in my whole life until I started reading about autism to learn more about my son's condition. I had no idea one was supposed to look in another persons eyes until I read it! I always watched mouths to interpret emotion. I wear my socks and underwear inside out because seams feel like they are cutting me. I can't handle smells, fabric softener is beyond my capacity to handle, on the rare occasion I visit someone's home, if scented candles are burning, I want to bolt for the door! I have left stores because the music was so distracting that I couldn't think about what I came in to buy. I am typing this so you will understand where I am coming from when I ask for your advice. I have had a life long terror of dentists, to the point of nearly having panic attacks just driving to the office. I can't even begin to explain to you how it has been. I have teeth like chalk that break easily, and the novacaine tends to wear off early in procedures. I have been treated very rudely by some dentists, tolerated by others. I never discuss autism unless asked where my son goes to school, since it is a well known school for children with disabilities, it occasionally comes up. I met a dentist a few years ago who has changed my life. I have no idea why he has been so kind to me. He told me I look alot like his daughter. I went home and cried, because my own father, the best dad a girl could have, I was a big daddy's girl-they say I would cry when any one else held me-died of a brain tumor when I was 7, and this dentist even has the same name as him. I had to have a root canal a while back, it took longer than expected, he stayed past the time the clinic closed just so I wouldn't have to make another appt, knowing I am scared of dentists. He always gives me an extra shot before I leave, so I have time to get pain meds by the time it wears off. If I am in with one of my children he'll come over and pat me on the back and ask how I'm doing. He has prescribed valium so I can take one the night before and two the morning of my appt, he scheduled my appt. last week at 7 in the morning, even though his schedule was full, so I wouldn't have to spend all day thinking about it. He gives me lots of nitrous and plays music just enough to cover the sound of the drill but not enough to cause problems.
Unfortunately, last week a root canal didn't work out, and he had to pull my front tooth. He felt horrible about it. He took the root canal and the extraction off my charges, gave me a false tooth to put there for free, and did a little cosmetic work on my bottom teeth while he was at it.He also did a bone graft for free where I had the extraction. He is going to put a bridge in the front, and crown the fourth tooth too, so my front teeth will all match and look nice. He says I'm a sweet girl and he is going to give me a hollywood smile. He said he loves his patients and wants the very best for them. He gave me his home and cell numbers in case I needed him.
I am socially a walking disaster. When I was in school my sister accused me of hanging around her because I couldn't make friends of my own-it hurt but it was true. If it is possible to do the wrong thing socially, I find a way. I can say something I have heard someone else say and everyone thought it was wonderful, I say it and everyone looks at me like I have a disease. I married someone on the spectrum who is my best friend. We both have dislike social situations and give each other space to pursue our obsessions- his is math and science, mine is music-guitar, violin etc. which I pick up quite easily.
Here is my question-finally-thank you if you read this far-
What is the socially appropriate way to thank this dentist for what he has done for me? Should I write him a letter, send a thank you note, simply say thank you, which seems so inadequate. I don't know what to do. I want to do something, so few people have been kind to me in my life. My own extended family has never understood my differentness, I guess maybe I got it from my dad, I only remember him from when I was a little girl and I do know his family is quite reclusive. I have heard he was quite gifted, could teach himself anything, but disliked social situations-sounds like me. Oh how I miss him!
Anyway any advice about how to thank this kind man who feels more like a kindred soul than my dentist, would be greatly appreciated. Thank you.
Editing to add: When I apologized for being scared the other day (I know I shouldn't be, It's just a physical reaction I have to dentists) he said "It's ok-we're all little kids on the inside". Yeah, even I know it would be socially inappropriate to fall at his feet and worship him!
Am I just thinking about all this too much?

I think a thank you would be fine. He has made great efforts to support you so just let him know that you appreciate what he has done. That should be reward enough.

Congratulations on finding a really fabulous dentist! I'm terrified of them, too.

Just tell him thank you, that should be plenty. He probably doesn't hear it often enough from his patients.

Recommend him to anyone looking for a dentist.

I would write him a short but sincere thank-you letter. Short enough that it fits on the inside of a greeting card.

Cause you're right, just saying "thank you" sounds pretty inadequate. Tell him how much his caring has meant to you, how highly you think of him, and leave it at that. If there's anything else that needs to be said, or that he wants to say to you, I'm sure it will be said at your next visit.

I really liked your suggestion, druidsbird. Thank you, that's exactly the kind of advice I need. I've decided to buy a fairly plain thank you note, and have put some thought into the past few days and come up with the following, what do ya'll think? (I really do need all the help I can get! )
Dr. (name),
Thank you so much for the excellent care you have provided over the years you have been my dentist. You've taken the sheer terror out of dentistry for me and made going to the dentist a comfortable and pleasant experience. Insurance reimbursements and copays could never repay the care, kindness, and understanding that you show your patients. We're very blessed to have you here in (name of our city). Thank you again, (signature)

I won't add "and if you ever move, please, take me with you!

I have been so unsure socially that I usually just do nothing and avoid social situations. This dentist has been so kind I just didn't want to let it go without an extra thank you, but I am very unsure of myself, I guess. I do try to say thank you at the end of every appt. Thank you for your help. Carolina73

Your dentist is going to love and treasure that note.
It was beautifully written.

Thank you Brennan and druidbird. I tend to get fixated on something and it will be a relief to send the card, and feel that I have properly thanked him. I wish there were more people like him in this world that just plain cared. I've been to lots of medical professionals and they're usually courteous but I feel like an appointment slot in their day that they have to get through and move on to the next one. I guess its not entirely their fault, they're paid to do a job, but everyone has a choice in their delivery manner, and especially when you're an aspie, an extra bit of understanding, a kind word, a gentle pat on the shoulder before you leave (and the feeling that you're not going to be talked about and laughed about by the staff when you leave) just makes situations that are already difficult so much easier to bear in ways that I'm not sure NTs can understand fully. Thanks so much for the input you provided. Carolina73

Nobody's ever offended by a card and chocolates

That's a wonderful "Thank You" letter, Carolina.

He seems to like his job very much.
Maybe it is so much fun to work on teeth he wants to do it lots.

That is a nice letter.