Feeling like a productive member of your Family.

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Sometimes I have trouble feeling like a productive member of my Family. I do a few chores around the house. However that doesn't seem to be enough, in my Eyes. I'm adding more tasks to my Chore Routine, whenever I can. There are a few tasks that I can do, whether somebody else is around, or not, like Bathrooms, Dusting and Laundry. There are other tasks that I need an empty house in order to do, like Vacuuming and Mopping. I can't mop, when somebody is walking around the house with wet shoes, which they aren't supposed to be doing, anyways. I can't Vacumm, unless I'm alone. My Mom likes to take Naps, and my Dad's a Custodian and when he's not at his School, he doesn't want to hear the Vacuum. I wasn't very productive, when I was a kid, and I'm trying to make up for my Childhood and my Adolecence. I've never felt that very much was expected of me, and I feel the need to show everybody that I have a Difference and not some horrible, crippling Disability.

Sounds good.

I know the feeling. Both my parents and many of my friends are very, very productive people. I get things done, but it seems to take me longer than most people, no matter how hard I try. So I give myself some slack, and just concentrate on getting there eventually... Keeps me from feeling bad about myself.

Just curious about this. My son is 11, and I expect him to pull his share of the household weight. Sometimes it takes him longer, and there are some chores I can't ask him to do (like take the trash to the dumpster after dark) because they are still way too far outside his comfort zone to be worth having him do. He's in charge of vaccuming every day (we have dogs) and making up his bed, helping his little sister make up hers. He clears his spot from the table after dinner and helps set the table. There are other, occassional odd chores as well.

Do you think you would have felt better about yourself if more had been expected of you at a younger age? I don't know how old you are, but certainly when you were younger far less was known about the spectrum of autism and how it presented and how best to treat it, so I am sure your parents acted with the best information available.

I would have felt a lot better about myself, if more was expected of me. I was diagnosed, back in 1980, at the age of Five. My folks still tell me that they don't expect much from me around the house, and it makes me feel like crap. I rebel, by cleaning the whole place.

I was assigned a few chores. I tend to compare myself to the rest of my Family. My Dad with his two Jobs, one which is his own Buisness, where he gets to use his Brain. My Mom with her McJob as Assistant Breakfast Manager, where she gets to use her Brain and my Little Sister who's three years younger and her Job at the Day Care, where she gets to use her Brain and she's taking challenging Courses in College on top of that. I've waisted my last two and a half years of High School, making sure I was nearly an A-Student, just to be corced into going into
Job Preperation Course for the Mentally Challenged. I'm not Mentally Challenged. I have an IQ of 113. That is Slightly Above Average. And the only time that I might have acted Mentally Challenged was before I've started Preschool. I've spent two years in that Mickey Mouse Course, just to end up doing the Plum Tasks in a Factory, that my Co-workers thought that they were too high above. I don't work there, anymore. That's why I feel the need to do all that Housework. I also do the Housework, because it helps me to keep my mind off my troubles and to think about my Parents, who would in turn, come home to a clean house. Doing Housework helps me to keep my mind off my Obsessions for a couple of hours.

Part of the reason we started our son on his chores was to pull him away from his perseverations - at first we could only get 5 mins at a time but now it is better. It was important to us that we treat him as much like the way we treated our other kids.

I can't imagine why you'd be considered mentally challenged with an IQ of 113. If that were the case, then most of my coworkers are a few steps short of that even!!

I would think that if you have the ability to get there (mass transit perhaps?) that you could handle many different kinds of jobs, certainly not just one in a factory. Working in a small office perhaps, where everyone needs to pull their weight and so there's not much time for idle chatter. Those are usually my preferred jobs.

It can't hurt to keep busy while you are home though - had you thought of taking up cooking or something? It might be more interesting than straight cleaning.

I think I will start cooking. I have a couple of Weight Watchers cookbooks, and it would be nice to be able to grab a Homemade Meal out of the Freezer, when my Mom feels like having Cereal for Dinner.