How to talk to people you hadn't contacted in a while?

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somebody300
Blue Jay
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Joined: 8 May 2016
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24 Jul 2016, 5:26 pm

There are some old friends I had back to high school that I want to contact.
What's the social norm for doing this? What should I say?



mik9
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24 Jul 2016, 7:56 pm

I'm currently out off spoons, but this is somehing I've thought about for a while.
You could always ask how it's going, sinse it's been a while.
And what they've been doing since you've met last time.
Are they still iterested in the same subjects as you are.



banana247
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01 Aug 2016, 11:15 pm

It's definitely easier through texting, messaging, etc. rather than calling on the phone. Just pick something like a few of the following:

"Hey!"
"You've been on my mind lately."
"Thinking of you!"
"It's been a while!"
"Long time no talkie!"
"How's it going?"
"What's new?"
"Are you still living in _?"
"Are you still working over at_?"

For me, the easy part is initiating cause people usually respond happily. The hard part is keeping the convo going. If you can remember specific things to ask about, that helps. Like ask about specific family members or pets by name, specific jobs or school majors, specific cities that they lived in, etc. Also, i've found that committing to responding quickly helps too. Sometimes I get at a loss for words and refrain from responding for a while, but i've found that this just gives time for the initial surprise of my contacting the person to wear off, and the person is less likely to be engaged or interested in what I have to ask or say. It also helps if you can quickly try to arrange a starbucks date or something to "catch up". If you just briefly "catch up" on everything casually through text, the convo drops off pretty fast. Good luck!