Part-time couch crasher may become roommate

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My roommates (who all grew up together in the suburbs) have a friend who has been staying with us in the city on the day he works. They talked me into hiring him at my job (I'm a manager) so that he could perhaps be our roommate. Our previous 4th roommate would have him over for extended periods of time so he is not a stranger, although it was very uncomfortable in the past before I knew him. He wants to speak with all of us tonight about taking the vacant room (we have been posting on Craigslist for two months without success) even though I know he cannot afford it with the hours he works now. I'm frustrated by his constant presence at home and at work. I do not want to live with an employee full-time. What is worse for me is that I must be diplomatic at work when I would otherwise be direct when I have an issue. He's a very intelligent guy, and I believe that is actually part of the problem I see with him at work. My boss (the Lead Assistant) took an immediate and unjustified dislike to him, and I've been unable to change that. It has caused a host of problems, but my biggest one has been his attitude that certain tasks are beneath him, and his absolute adherence to the bare minimum (and yet he performs that admirably). I believe that he will not change his attitude, and I think it will be his downfall in time, which presents an economic concern for him as a roommate.

Additionally, I find his presence tolerable (or even enjoyable) only in the light of his 3 day per week trip home. He was at first understanding of my needs for extreme quiet, for routine, and for very limited guests, particularly overnight guests. I have been very reasonable in letting him have his girl of interest over to spend the night in the room he occupies; she is out of my way. But lately, he seems to have been taking the attitude that my needs are simple quirks or brattiness, even though I have tried to explain that to me, loud noise creates physical and mental anguish. That my entire mental state can be thrown by emerging from my room in the early morning (when I am usually alone in wakefulness) by seeing a stranger wandering aimlessly around the living room-it's happened two weeks running and I couldn't even get food from the kitchen for my discomfort. This was an unannounced guy who is a suburban friend he allowed to stay the night.

I think you should talk to your other roommates about this. You two seem to have some personality conflict and you should probably point out that you are not interested in causing any problems, but unless this guy can respect things you need respected, you will not be able to continue living there with them.

I agree with Chronos completely, its a total personality clash. Its one thing to be friends with someone, its a whole different story to live with that person.

I had three really good friends half a year ago who I used to hang out with and party with 3-4 times a week for a while. When the new term approached and all our current apt leases ended we all decided to live together for the summer...what a mistake that was! Sure I liked them all but they were very extroverted, outgoing and social partier types, I'm introverted, need my peace and quiet and cant stand when they had ppl in and out of our apt all day and threw parties half the week during the night. They or their friends also tended to drinkl beer i had in the fridge, one guy left on our stove all nigth and almost started a fire, their partying friends or their friends friends stole at least $400s worth of stuff from my room and they would ask to use my really really nice bong to smoke in big groups, not cool as it could break and i dont trust ppl i dont know. As a result I grew very resentful towards them and drifted further and further apart to the point of kind of isolating myself in my room when ppl were over and now those friendships are ruined.

You should stop this before you ruin a friendship, just my two cents