Christmas Day Meal!

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I think I have AS or something on the spectrum. On Christimas Day we are having a meal in my house where i live with my parents and younger brother. My auntie and uncle will be there and so will my younger brother who is 18 also my 80 year old grandmother as well.

The issue is I have though is that i am shy and even with my family i can get anxiety and not say much at the table. I will try my best effort to talk but the thing is with my younger brother who is an NT I cannot win. When I say nothing at the table he gives me damaging feedback in private saying things to me like "You get so shy and quiet its ridiciolous. And its like if i do say something my brother scrutinized me for saying stupid irrelivant things.

I will admit myself though it is a little bizzare getting anxious over family coming round but its not like i see them that often.

Its annoying becasue its christmas but even having a damn meal with my family has to be trial for me

The worst thing is when i do say something my brother makes awkward facial expressions at me which really put me off.

When I drink wine or alchol it can make me more chatty and relaxed and amongst people.

On the postive side my auntie and uncle came round in september for a meal and i did quite well in communicating with them even though my brother did make one or two awkward facial expressions at me.


Can I just have a survival guide on how to get through christmas day with my family?

The way I always get through Christmas is to eat snacks periodically, and talk to everyone at least once, so I can get it out of the way. My parents will still treat me like crap as they always do when we have guests over, but there is nothing I can do about that. Now, I'm not sure how to help you get through Christmas with your family, because my family is different from yours in all likelihood. Just remember that they are full of crap, and not to take them too seriously.

Yeah but come on christmas day is suppoused to be a day of joy and celebration NOT a friggin stage peformance.

Not with a narcissistic family. It's all about the stage performance. I've had so much practice that I decided that being a stand up isn't so bad after all.

What do you mean narcassitic family?

Don't be afraid to speak up at the table, and if your brother takes issue with it, let him know you don't really care.

I used to make it a habit not to look at one of my sisters when we used to go out to dinner with people because if I did, she'd inevitably be giving me some disapproving glance over something I was saying or did, and I think even most NT's would have agreed with me that she was just being overly sensitive.

She knew I didn't care what she thought of me though.