Big crowds, little crowds...

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Hi,

I wondered if anyone else felt the same way about this.....

Earlier in the year i went to a big concert in Hyde Park, London, to see Paul Mccartney. It was the 2010 Hard Rock Calling festival and he was headlining on the Sunday night.

Now this was about 50,000 people and i am sure that many so called experts will say that an AS person just would not cope for one minute in such a situation. But I loved it.

Yet put me in a situation with a few people in the social club around the corner and i am lost, confused, bored and dread any interaction with anyone.

Now my own explanation would be that back in Hyde Park everyone was there for a particular reason, to see a legend, so everyones attention was on him. At the concert i never felt awkward, threatened or in anyway "distant" from the other people, i just felt i could blend in perfectly.

Yet when i am with local drinkers or am near town drinkers on nights out i feel like i want to run a million miles to my fortress of solitude. Again i am guessing that thats becuase there is no "common" interest or focus for people so the social situation with local drinkers is chaotic, and anarchistic which is my greatest fear.

So although i know how painfull social situations are its not the number of people that matters its the context.

I should imagine that most of you have come to that conclusion before but i thought i would share it with you.

Thanks

Crowds are not all the same. Some crowds have the expectation of alot of speaking and stuff, and that can be scary. But even in a nightclub, there are ways out. I tend to move around alot and dance. People don't bother you if you're dancing, and it's fun and good exercise.
At a concert, the crowd would usually rather watch the performer than waste time on conversations that no one can hear. Especially if they paid alot of $$. So not much pressure there, just watch the show.
Crowds at the mall are also rather easy, since no one wants to speak to anyone other than who they came with. Going to the mall alone isn't bad... once in a while some weird person will try and talk to me there, but I'll simply answer them and then move on.

I have never really found concerts to be a problem yet going to the local shop and speaking to one person an absolute nighmare ! !

The only problems I have had with crowds is when lots of my peers are included. I don't mind sitting in a classroom with about 18-30 students, but I feel slightly awkward at school assemblies.

If the crowd includes a lot of adults, no matter what the size, I'm fine. I went to the 2010 Olympics and actually LIKED the crowd. Same with concerts.

This is one of the reasons why I am unsure why AS is the right diagnosis.

I think another aspect for me could be order. When i was at school i always liked order and control so that it reduced or eliminated interaction with other kids and thus the misery and bullieing.

I didnt give a damn what i was being taught just as long as it was a strict teacher that kept control.

Opposite.

Big crowds and small crowds. I can't stand it.

Big crowds are to loud, to many people, I feel like a lot of my personal space is taken. I feel crowded and get a sense of claustrophobia. I can only really stand about 30mins in a big crowd. 1hr is my maximum.

Little crowds, I feel awkward, socially. I make a lot of mistakes, say stupid things, do stupid things, fumble around. Feel lost and confused.

I don't do well in either situation.