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psybot
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23 May 2006, 5:40 am

Hi humans
Well I have somehow improved slightly with socialising. I'm no longer scared to do so. However, I'd like to know more conversation starters.
I think all that comes to mind now, is "What's up?" and "How are you?" and "How was your day?" and "What have you been upto?". I guess if I know someone has done something I'll say "How was the thing?" or "How is the thing going?".

I dunno.. any ideas anyone?



Tashie
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26 May 2006, 4:23 pm

I was taught to think of a set of images...

Its a house, with a car sitting on the drive.
Go into the house and the first room is a study with a desk.
The next is a living room with a big TV screen
Then the kitchen
Out through the back door into the garden, there's a loud plane going over
On the right is a patio area with a pool and a small home gym

So why think of these images...

The house = Where do you live?
The car = Do you drive? What sort of car do you drive?
The desk = What do you do for a job?
The TV = Seen any good films recently?
Kitchen = Do you like to cook? What's your favourite food? Been to any good restaurants lately?
The overhead plane = Have you been on holiday lately? Are you planning a holiday?
Pool and gym = Do you follow sport? Do you like doing any sports?

But real trick is to follow them up with a nice open question, like...

Where do you live? London. Oh I'd love to hear what you think of London, please tell me something about it.
What sort of car do you drive? Ford. What made you choose a Ford over other makes?
What do you do for a job? Teacher. What do you enjoy most about teaching?
Seen any good films recently? Yes, Da Vinci Code. What did you think of the plot lines/ lead actor/ cinema?
Whats your favourite food? Prawns. I like those too, can you tell me a good recepie?
Are you planning a holiday? Yes, France. What made you choose France?
Do you follow sport? Yes, cycling. I don't know much about cycling, please tell me something about it.

The only thing with these open questions is you need to be careful to sound interested, I've fallen into the trap of getting my tone of voice wrong and sounding sarcastic, thats a lead balloon for conversation I promise!

The other thing is be very sure to really listen to the answers, it is so easy to tune out when you're not interested, but what they are saying will give you clues on where to take the conversation later.

Lastly I was told that at a party you should try not to spend more than 10 minutes talking to one person or they may feel cornered, give them a chance to move away, and then if you really like them you can make a second visit later and use what you've learned about the other people at the party as a point of conversation.

Good luck, and if you come up with any great conversation pieces please pass them on :) 8O :)



Aeriel
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27 May 2006, 8:41 am

Tashie, that's some great advice!

If I want to start a conversation, I usually offer a compliment. "What a nice shirt, where did you find it?" "What an unusual ring, was it custom-made?" Anything to show you are observant and interested.

The response will let you know where to take the conversation next; you might discover a common interest, or a good place to buy a nice shirt. :P



CockneyRebel
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28 May 2006, 8:17 am

"I have dreams of hopping on and off Routemasters!" No...no. Ignore that one. That's a bad one. :lol:

Now it's time for me to get serious. I'm going to start an experiment on myself, starting on Tuesday, when I go back to my Club House. I'm going to be All Things To All People. What that means is that I'm going to associate with all of the Members who will happen to be at the Club House, this Tuesday and on the Tuesdays, Saturdays and occasional Wednesdays to come. This Tuesday, I'll do a Round-up and ask every Member that I spot, what their Hobbies, Interests and Passions are. On the following days that I visit my Club, I'll be able to strike up conversations with everybody there. Than I won't feel that I'm imposing myself on other people, and I'll get to know everybody and the best part is that people will wonder what's going on, in that Groovy Mind of mine, therefore, I'd be a true "International Woman of Mystery". :P



AaronAgassi
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07 Jul 2006, 4:09 am

psybot wrote:
Hi humans
Well I have somehow improved slightly with socialising. I'm no longer scared to do so. However, I'd like to know more conversation starters.
I think all that comes to mind now, is "What's up?" and "How are you?" and "How was your day?" and "What have you been upto?". I guess if I know someone has done something I'll say "How was the thing?" or "How is the thing going?".

I dunno.. any ideas anyone?


Such conventionally empty noises will tend only to draw a sheer blank from me!


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AaronAgassi
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07 Jul 2006, 4:10 am

Aeriel wrote:
Tashie, that's some great advice!

If I want to start a conversation, I usually offer a compliment. "What a nice shirt, where did you find it?" "What an unusual ring, was it custom-made?" Anything to show you are observant and interested.

The response will let you know where to take the conversation next; you might discover a common interest, or a good place to buy a nice shirt. :P


Much better!


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AaronAgassi
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07 Jul 2006, 4:13 am

CockneyRebel wrote:
"I have dreams of hopping on and off Routemasters!" No...no. Ignore that one. That's a bad one. :lol:

Now it's time for me to get serious. I'm going to start an experiment on myself, starting on Tuesday, when I go back to my Club House. I'm going to be All Things To All People. What that means is that I'm going to associate with all of the Members who will happen to be at the Club House, this Tuesday and on the Tuesdays, Saturdays and occasional Wednesdays to come. This Tuesday, I'll do a Round-up and ask every Member that I spot, what their Hobbies, Interests and Passions are. On the following days that I visit my Club, I'll be able to strike up conversations with everybody there. Than I won't feel that I'm imposing myself on other people, and I'll get to know everybody and the best part is that people will wonder what's going on, in that Groovy Mind of mine, therefore, I'd be a true "International Woman of Mystery". :P

You're a demon on wheels, you are!


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Aaron Agassi -=- FoolQuest.com