Strange Friendship, I really dont get this?

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Edit: I edited some stuff out, cause I was hoping people would be more likely to read and respond if it wasnt so long.

Me and M have always had a strange friendship. We met in chem we worked on almost everything together. Ive noticed that M's body language contradicts what he does. M doesnt really say hi, he will often act closed off from me and I found it so strange. But M has done so much for me even in the beginning. He's helped me so much with the course, I dont know how I would have gotten thru chem without him.

Well this semester, we were no longer in the same class. I had a mad crush on his roommate. So I went to talk to him about it. Before M knew this he barely said anything to me for 2-3 weeks in the beginning of the semester. When I asked what was up, he didnt tell me, he gave me some BS saying we're no longer in the same class. When I finally told him that I liked his roommate(S), M started talking to me again. We had numerous conversations about S, he gave me some very practical advice about what to do. These conversations about S eventually evolved into me talking about my issues and problems because he kept asking Qs and I kept giving answers. So I ended up talking to M quite a bit about my social problems and he was able to explain things very understandably to me. I found this weird cause he doesnt come off as the type who would be willing to listen to this stuff. M gets me better then most people, yet he still acts closed off.

Then S got a gf, I was devistated and I was starting to close myself off from S. M in a way saved our me and S's friendship by bringing me up to their room and facilitating a conversation between us.

Im confused. Why does M act so closed off from me yet hes done more then majority of my friends have for me? Is this one of those mentor/mentee relationships? Cause M really doesnt seem like the type that would do that? Am I a charity case to him? He did tell me once that he tries to treat me like every1 else.

Last edited by Ai_Ling on 20 Apr 2011, 9:02 pm, edited 2 times in total.

Does he act differently towards other friends ?. I dont know what to say about this other then see how he behaves with his other friends.

And what do you mean with closed off exactly ?.

It seems to me like you should just take his word over it. Since he has shown to be trust worthy even if he acts closed of sometimes.

I feel he is not as closed off towards others, he still acts kinda closed off. When I say closed off, I mean I will go up to him and S. I will mostly talk to S and I will try to talk to M and he doesnt really say much or he appears to be paying attention to something else. But seriously he will still notice things. Sometimes during our talks hes pointed subtle things out to me about my behavior when he was appearingly not paying attention. He often doesnt try to talk to me much. I mostly intiate conversations with him. In many ways I was just like u know its not a reciprocal friendship if hes not intiating things with me, he doesnt wanna be friends. But then who does so much for someone else if they dont have desire to be friends?

This sounds like a situation I was in many years ago. This is just a theory mind....

Maybe M has romantic feelings for you, but considers you unobtainable. Therefore he trys to make or break your relationship with S, so he can try and get over you.

As I said, just a theory.

Heres the thing with that. Admittedly, I do have some feelings for him not strong feelings tho. I was thinking if he knows very well what Im thinking then he probably senses it and feels some discomfort with it. Hes strongly hinted to me 3x that he was not interested in me. We can be discussing something that is only remotely related and hes sees the opportunity to give me this "message", he does.

For instance: I asked him if he has a secret gf, cause S has a gf now and S kept it a secret for a week till I found out. He asked me, "what use is it for you to know?"