Talking to people

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I am a very shy and quiet person. I find it difficult having conversations with people especially people I don't know. It is difficult to think of things to talk about. I hate small talk and complaining, I would rather talk about something intelligent or profound. I find it difficult to share things about my life, feel like I don't have a lot of stories or experiences to share. It must be a self-esteem issue. I also can't be sure if people are interested in what I have to say.

What are some methods to help me start and maintain conversations?
What are some things other people like to talk about?
How can I make it easier to talk about my self?

Hm. Well first, welcome to WrongPlanet

I am probably one of the worst people on this site to be giving advice on starting and maintaining conversation... you need some of our more charismatic members. heh... but I will tell you what my aunt told me... people like to talk about themselves and the best conversationalists are the ones who are best at listening to others while randomly speaking up to ask them open-ended questions about what they have said... giving them the chance to expound. This advice would seem to work best for people who are quiet by nature as it takes a lot of pressure off of you to maintain the chatter. The idea behind this is to ask a starter question and then ask more questions. I am not sure what type of question to start with though as I am not sure what your idea of intelligent or profound is... nor do I know what type of people you would be communicating with. I am not sure that would help me though as I am dreadful with maintaining conversations that are not related to specific topics.

As for what people like to talk about... that varies from person to person. I have met people who want to talk about ways to make tesla coils in my back yard, people who want to talk about hair dye, people who love sports, people who love tv shows, people who love tarot cards... I think most people are cool with talking about their hobbies or interests though as well as what is going on in their life. I think most people really like to talk about themselves.

As for thing number three... uh... practice? This site could be helpful for that as a lot of posters here make topics asking things like, "does anybody else do/feel/think this or that" you could go there and relate some of your own experience. I understand that it is not the same as face to face interactions, but it is a start. Yeah... I am really not the best to answer... hopefully someone else will have better suggestions...

But again, welcome. Take a look around... it really is a cool site with some wonderful people.

my approach: get used to the fact that you will feel awkward. be endearingly and unapologetically so.