Can it get any worse?

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So my mom told me she plans on having a cookout for the fourth of july. Yeah, I can handle that no problem... and later we are having fireworks... yeah, big problem... fireworks are like hell for me if they are close by. I told her I could bring out my laptop with the headphones, "You don't need to do that, you're going to be there to socialize" HELLO... SOCIALIZE?! I HAVE ASPERGER SYNDROME!! ! I'm not going to socialize if being around people I hardly know very well... my mom 'claims' she knows what autism is and yet she doesn't stop to think about it and realize it... its almost like she forgets I'm even autistic to begin with. I mean I love fireworks but I don't want them that close... nor do I want to ruin the routine of not seeing them...

It just stupid that I have to deal with all of that extra stimulation I don't need. What's worse is I'll be so cluttered with the background noise I'll probably start having a meltdown. My mom won't listen to what I say, nor will she even consider changing the plans. I don't want to not see the fireworks but having them that close is murder to my poor hypersensitive ears...

I mean its just... I really don't like having to socialize. If fireworks are going off right by our house, loud as hell, with people talking all at once... what can I do? Music won't do anything because the fireworks will be loud... I just don't know. It's worse because she won't even do anything to understand.

I don't want to ruin her little fourth of July occasion but... is it worth not doing anything about it and than having to go through a meltdown of changes in routine, sensory overload and forced social interaction?

It sounds like you're being flexible with the Fourth plans. Yes, the cookout is fine. Close-by fireworks? Big problem.

It sounds like your Mom might need to be a little flexible.

But she's not... I mean she is a bit autistic herself... but she's not really high enough on the spectrum for her to realize what I HAVE TO GO THROUGH... and it really bothers me. I feel like I'm the one being wronged here because she's the one who's going to start screaming at me because she can't have a social occasion with fireworks... any other time she tells people I have Asperger Syndrome when something bothers me... but when its between me and her... she doesn't even realize it. I'm afraid to even bring up the factor.

Wow. Is there an analogy you could use to describe to her what the noise means to you?

Nope... like I said, even if I told my dad about it, she's just going to blow up in my face and throw a fit because she can't have her little social outing she wants. I mean I would rather just go to the place we always go for fireworks... but noooo... she has to have the whole family there for the fireworks at him because she doesn't want to go out and watch them...

Can you wear ear plugs during the fireworks?

No, they irritate my ears. I have sensitive ears so anything can make them start burning and aching for no reason... I'm not sure if its because of having undiagnosed Auditory processing disorder but... yeah.

It appears that nobody is listening to you. Join the club. Nobody listens to the SammichEater either. One day they'll figure it out though, or at least I hope so.

It's not that... my dad understands but my mom just won't deal with it. I mean I could come out knowing I have something and she would just be like, "why do you always look stuff up like that? I wish you wouldn't." It pisses me off because I'm trying to figure out why I act a certian way. I know I have Auditory Processing Disorder because I have all the symptoms... its just currently undiagnosed because I won't see my psychiatrist for a while.

Why don't you just get some foam ear plugs? They sell them at most drug stores.

That's why.

Instead of foam earplugs, ask your Mom to go to the sporting goods store and get you the ear covers that people use when they are target shooting. They keep out the noise of gunshots and should work for fireworks. Maybe you could try them and they won't bother your ears? And as a bonus you won't have to listen to the people talk too when you have them on.