I've decided that I'm perfectly happy being friendless.

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Being able to pursue things that are important or fun to me is more important than having friends. What are friends good for anyway? People my age don't want to discuss anything intelligent or interesting, so I don't see the point of even trying to have conversations with them.

Having been in this friendless state for a few years now, I'm more or less emotionally unaffected by it now. I'm used to it - to do anything differently would feel awkward now. I think that any of you who are depressed because you don't have any friends in real life need to start looking at the advantages of not being burdened by the constant need for dull interaction with others.

as aspies we think we dont need friends, but as aspies who try to adjust i feel that friends and making, cultivating and maintaining friendships are important as an adjustment to adapting to a non-aspie world.
i went frindless for a while, but i have learnt recently that having and mainaining friendships is an important and learnable skill.

The problem is, though, that most other people just wouldn't want to discuss things that I want to discuss.

I don't have any friends, and sometimes that doesn't bother me, but other times it does. Whenever somebody shows me a hint of friendship it really bothers me that I dont have friends because deep down I want them so bad. Every once and a while, usually every 2 years or so, somebody will be my friend for a short while, usually a month or two, then turn on me. After that it takes me a while to be content with having no friends again.

I don't have any friends either and have decided to take that same path as well my friend. I'm kind of in the same position as you, no true friends, tried to make some but to no avail am either rejected or just feeling out of place.

I've given up with social interaction and would prefer to be by myself.

If NTs don't want me around, I might as well f**k off.

I'm a friend to all, but have no true friends though, just mates or aquaintaces that I can't be bothered to extend a relationship with because when I try and ask in the nice way to see if I can go over to their house, but they either say "they're busy" or "they've got someone else over." which is either 9 times out of 10 a lie or the truth.

Then I imagine your solution would be to find those who DO want to discuss things. I'm sure many here wouldn't mind, in real life or not, discussing some of your interests.

I think you accepting the way things are is fantastic, but dont sell out the option OF friends. Society doesn't work well if we all kept to ourselves, so there IS a need. We arent completely self-sufficient.

I would love to discuss my topics but I know not everyone else wants to - likewise, I dont discuss what they want. Compromise? Listen to their conversations, let them listen to yours. People only want to ask me questions out of a favour, I feel, and I feel by not showing interest in them I'm giving no reason for them to do the same back.

for the record, I went to a Thanks Giving dinner with people I've never met. One couple brought their 15 year old son with them. He was big on animals, and I could tell by the way he spoke, he was deeply interested in his topic. I let him talk about animals, zoos, and other related interests he had. I let him talk for 20 minutes on it. He loved discussing it, and even though I wasn't deeply interested, I paid attention and learned a few things. Afterwards, a fellow from India and I discussed geography - Him and I truely were asking as many questions as we answered - He knew when he had spoken for a length, I respected that and paid him back by letting him speak after I felt like I had spoken at length.

I find true, good conversation involves equal participation from both parties - I know many do not respect that though - just an observation, personal

I went friendless for a while, until I've found a decent groups of friends. I now enjoy going out with my real friends.

I'm antisocial and i'm staying that way because ITS SWEET!! !! !

I have friends over the internet, and I do talk to people in real life. I've got friends, but I'm perfectly happy not being Sir Popular Kid With Too Many Friends To Count.

humans aren't meant to be lonely. they're meant to have solidarity and companionship.

trust me. it's been proven in studies. elsewise you die.

You know... play to your strengths, as far as i'm concerned. Pursue your interested, but keep this in mind;

There's always self-improvement involved, if only you can find someone to bounce ideas and dialogue off of. If it's someone with not only NT but also "Trash Culture" interests you're not getting anywhere; theat's the obvious part.

The not-so-obvious part is that no matter your interests, there's gotta be SOMEONE out there with similar hobbies and whatnot. Finding hir... is a matter of sheer effort. I should know, I won't even put up with 'smalltalk' unless i'm getting something sufficient (tangible or otherwise) out of it.

In the long run, discipline is your friend. Don't pine for social interaction... but don't outright shank it either; like all else it's a tool, one in which you can smash your thumb with as easily as you can hammer a genius idea together with.

I'm at that state of mind as well.

Know how that feels. My only friend in high school was that way. He would hang with me at school but heaven forbid we ever do anything together outside of school. He would never come over to my house nor would he allow me to come over to his. I know he was lying because nobody can be THAT busy. Especially since he seemed to always have time for his other friends.

I'd hate to be friendless, I have like 2 close friends and talk to aspies over the net.

I went essentially friendless from mid-98 through late 05 (from early 99 through October 05 being intentional, mostly out of fear of myself and other people), without finding much in the way of real friends until July of this year.

It's horrible on the mind. I'm still trying to get over the resulting madness and depression it caused.

That's whats happened with me.

My sum:

Social anxiety + stress = depression.

Social anxiety meaning worrying to make just 1 friend.

I'm on medication so now it reduces my anxiety....but makes me distracted easily along with a lot of physical side effects.