So irritated

Post Reply New Topic

I have a friend who at one point was a romantic interest, but because of an old girlfriend, I stepped aside and told him I would rather be a friend than nothing at all. His girlfriend knows about me and is OK with me too. Thing is, he still has had occasional feelings for me, and even though I am poly and he has poly tendencies (she does as well), he is backing away from me. He has done little things (erase a status message I commented on on facebook and not returning emails being two of many). I asked him point blank if there was something going on, and he said: "I won't reply to emails unless I feel there is something to say." Now, I was not referring to emails. I was talking about the FB status he erased, but I did not say that. What struck me as odd is that he usually does not respond to emails unless it is important. He has been a good sounding board for me for quite some time. I don't mind if he does not respond, unless it is important, and then I ask him to respond.

Now, he is really acting weird, and I have the distinct impression he does not want to talk with me or be around me anymore, but he does not want to actually say it because he does not want to hurt my feelings. I have told him flat out that if there is something going on, he HAS to tell me. I would much rather be hurt a little bit by something than to be devastated later. I am at the point of being devastated. If he does not want to be friends anymore, I wish he would just say so. If I am under the impression that he does not mind being friends, then I will contact him occasionally, and if he really does not want to be, he will become bitter and that will just lead to disaster. It is really bugging me. I wish people would not "spare my feelings." Just say it already, or it will make it worse. I have been giving him space, and the last time I said anything was a couple days ago, I just said "I hope you are staying cool (it was 100 out). It had been well over a week that I have said anything to him before that. It just really irritates me.