DIfficulties with communication

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My boyfriend and I are both aspies, we are constantly hurting each others feelings unintentionally. This may sound terrible but when I offend other people I don't really care, most people don't seem real to me so I don't care how I affect them. This relationship is important to me however and we both need to learn how to be more sensitive and communicate effectively.

Any advice?

I've been looking for a good book on communication but I can't seem to find anything that fits, if anyone has a suggestion please let me know.

Maybe if you talk with your boyfriend about that and agree to communicate feelings to each other in an not accusing way, like when one of you feels hurt by the other person they can tell it without having a bad conscience. I think that would be a good way to learn on each other - how the other persons feels and thinks and which situations exactly hurt the most. It would give you both a sense for each other by time.
If you both can't communicate feelings verbally write them down on a paper, pick a box, put a paper with 'our feelings' on it and everyone can throw their papers into it and you talk from time to time when everyone seems in a good mood about it. You both can also write down when the other person made you happy, when it would not only be about negative feelings.
Sorry my English is not so good but I hope you get me. This box thing works for many things within a family and it works, try it : )