one way friendships

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I have a few people I can talk to and tell how I feel. Yet it is only one way. I don't know why I feel I can talk to them and trust them.

Then there is someone else who talks to me, but I don't feel I can talk to her.

So I end up talking to the few people above, telling them some things (not the same topic or in depth as I could) or having another friend talk to me. I don't know why she feels she can talk to me.

I just know I am sick of not having any friendships that go two way. Most of the time when I am frustrated and need to vent or talk, it is here. I can think of two, maybe three others but none of them live in the same state as I do. They are ones I private message that I have met in other groups.

Someone define friendship anyway. I mean is someone a friend that you see a lot and are friendly with (like from classes or church) even though neither of you share how you feel or do anything with? Or does friendship have to be with someone you can tell how you feel and they can tell you how they feel? Does simply seeing someone regulary (class, church, work,) make you friends because you are friendly with each other? Or do you have to see them outside of those situations?

How can I make a friendship where someone can tell me how they feel when they need to talk and I can tell them. I've been told I'm a good listener at times but that is basically when people tell me about emotions that make no sense to me and I can't experience. But people don't talk to me about those types of things often. Do any of you ever feel like you are missing certain emotions?

Sometimes appearing normal, in work and places where I have been going to for a long time, is very tiring. And if I don't know the people a lot, or haven't known them individually or for as long, my Asperger's is more visible.

Any advice?

Hi Uhura,
I'm not sure I can give advice, as I have trouble understanding relationships too.

From what I've worked out, there are different levels of friendships - level 1) people who you see occasionally and can say hello to; level 2) people who you see often and can chat to about lots of stuff; level 3) and people who you know love you and care about you whatever happens and who you feel the same way about.

At university, people befriended me and helped me, and I thought they were actual friends, but then they dropped me and we don't have any communication now. I was so confused and angry.

I also get confused with my relationship with my therapists - I can tell them things that I can't tell anyone else (not even my type 3 friends) and they help me lots, but they are not my friends. My psychiatrist explained it as "Just because I (psychiatrist) am not your friend does not mean I cannot take an interest in you, like you and help you on a professional basis. Conversely, just because I am helping you (and like and respect you as a person) does not mean that we are friends"

Does that help?

Thanks. I still don't know how I feel though.