One of my most embarrassing memories is of me telling a joke

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I was the second one to come up to the bus line. I was a normal sized 6th grader. The first guy was a big 8th grader. I don't know why, but I walked up side by side with him instead of behind him. He was still facing forward, turned his head to me, and said something like,

I wasn't worried that he really would kick my ass. And I probably should have just did what he said. But instead I wanted to try a joke because thats what everybody else does. But this was at a time in my life when I hadn't yet figured out the dynamics of s**t talking, cut downs, joking, etc. I said to him verbatim,



I don't remember what he said, but I remember the effect of what he said. Basically he said that he would have kicked my ass but didn't because he felt sorry for me, referring to my being ret*d. He said I'm ret*d, not that my joke was ret*d. I don't remember the feelings that this gave me. But I do know what feelings I got much later when I would remember this story.

I never realized it. This is classic aspergers behavior. I'm glad no one told me something was wrong with me. If someone told me that, I would have believed them. Instead, I just thought I was weird and no more. I did think something was wrong me with, but I was never sure. It would have been a much different story if someone labeled me with aspergers. The label would have crushed me I think.

I started to get used to these feelings. It took a long time before I could create jokes that anyone would laugh at. I remember that I learned sarcasm at a late age of 19. I spent a lot of time with my sister's future husband. He used sarcasm (jokingly) on me all the time. It took a long time for me just to notice it, let alone wield it. What if I hadn't spent that time with him? Would I have learned sarcasm? I guess eventually I would have, but maybe not. My whole life I've had my brothers and close friends teaching me how to act in social situations. What if I didn't have their help? What if I was truly alone in my quest to learn how to act?

Please tell us about your embarrassing moments.

Last edited by rombomb2 on 15 Dec 2011, 3:04 am, edited 1 time in total.

I think your response was quite good Certainly I would not have been able to come up with anything on the spot like that while at school - or at least not out loud. That took guts, a quick wit and good humour.

Knowing I'm an Aspie / have strong Aspie traits has enabled me to think along the lines of: Okay there's a reason why I don't quite fit in here. I'm not some weirdo, rather I have aspergers syndrome (like many others) hence my brain works slightly different from most peoples. When I therefore make mistakes now, I try not to be too hard on myself as I'm running at a disadvantage compared to NTs. Its not easy - but I'm using this forum to learn new skills, and also looking to the positives of being an Aspie (i.e. strong sense of social justice, dislike of lying, see solutions to problems that NTs don't, etc)

Embarrassing moments from the past (before I learned to try to not to take things too seriously!):

When I was a teenager or getting near to being a teenager I decided to stare intently into a girls eyes thinking momentarily that that this would make her know that I liked it. Most likely she would just have thought me weird or not noticed. At the time I fealt like an idiot for doing it.

New years eve I found myself sitting next to a friend of my brothers - a really attractive girl - while everyone else was up dancing. She tried to make normal conversation with me thinking I'd be as outgoing and witty as my brother. I did my best but the conversation kept drying (annoying when you know what's happening yet don't have the ability to fix things). Things went quite for a moment and - while trying to figure out what she was thinking, I came to the wrong conclusion, and quite stupidly asked her if she wanted to kiss (which I don't think is normal, espcially in my dull tones). That pretty much ended the conversation.

I also wrote an email (more like an essay) which came close to being either a love letter of sorts (not explicity in any way though) to someone I shouldn't have - like the first instance occassionally I get a warped view of reality for a whilte before coming to my senses! She didn't respond to it. The morning after I sent it I looked over it and felt really embarrassed - was a very odd non-NT sounding document.

Most of mine are like that - in situations where people expect you to be normal (NT)- and you slip up revealing that you're not.

Well thank you Paul123. But I don't think it was guts. I think it was stupidity, or lets make it softer, naivety.

Btw, I've already slipped up on this forum and I've only been here a few days. And I've already explained and apologized. Looks like we'll be dealing with this for the rest of our lives.

What is important is that we learn how to gracefully bounce back from a slip up, just as you described.

I make sure to keep all of my most embarrassing moments dedicated to my memory so I'll always have something to make me cringe right as I'm about to fall asleep.
The best moments are when I'm trying to sleep and I suddenly remember something that happened years ago that I didn't think was embarrassing at the time, but now I realize it's cringe worthy.
Then I have to get up and walk it off before I can get back to sleep.

I usually carry my worst memories around with me non-stop. While it is very difficult to do things I still manage to do them. It really sucks because when I am trying to do things, they get in my way.

Actually if you talk about them with people, it serves to stop resurfacing and causing anxiety. Try it. Tell us your embarrassing moments.