middle ground

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I seem to be too standoffish one minute, and coming on too strong the next. I think there are a few people at work that want to be friends, but I can't seem to make the connection. When I try to make more of an effort, they back way off. I don't think I should give up just yet, but this is causing an enormous amount of anxiety.
Any advice?

I also have a hard time finding that middle ground.