Accused of being condescending - what?

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So a friend of mine got annoyed at me. Long story short, we were talking about a film and she didn't know what I meant when I said that "the overall story was good, but the plot was a mess". She didn't know that there was a difference between plot and story, so I explained that in film studies I was taught this difference and explained it to her.

I think she took it to mean that I was questioning her intelligence, even though I wasn't, and took offense to it. She said I was being condescending and that she studied film as well. Well, I don't doubt that, but she obviously forgot or didn't get taught that part. I don't know how that is insulting. She knows a lot of stuff I don't know and she will talk for ages on why she is right about stuff. I don't take it personally when she corrects me or tells me when I'm misinformed. Maybe I said it in a tone that sounded condescending?

She does tend to read a lot into what people say. And to be fair, I can come across as arrogant and intentionally rude. We also share a stubbornness that can make us kinda pig headed (I think I'm probably the worst for that). It's probably just a silly misunderstanding and we'll get over it.

But I dunno. She's sort of avoided speaking directly to me. Maybe I'm the one being paranoid cuz I do have problem for holding grudges. But - I dunno - it just seems that when I'm joining a group conversation, its like she will only talk to other people even when they are talking to me. I guess she just needed space or something, but it seems a bit petty.

I guess I'm being petty for being annoyed about this as well. Its such a trivial thing. Part of me thinks that she is wrong for reading way too much into my intentions, but part of me is also sorry for hurting her feelings, even though it was unintentional.

I guess I still have a lot more to learn about interpersonal stuff.

Just because she's NT doesn't make it gospel. She might of felt stupid and taken it out on you.

She's not technically NT, though. She's not on the spectrum, so I understand what you mean.

I just wonder if I'm somehow responsible for any collateral damage.

What IS the difference between a plot and a story??? I don't think it's common knowledge.

Ask her :"Condescending means to talk down to some one, is that what you meant"

I think you're reading into it too much, over-analysing it.

There's the possibility of a one-word answer to why you had difficulties:

Women


(PS await the opening of the gates of hell in response to this!)

Mr Bigmouth, most people don't know the difference. Even I used to get it mixed up. Best way to describe it is this: the story is like the human body and the plot is like all the parts that make a human body. You can't really have one without the other.

The plot is just the events that make up the film itself, but the story is the plot and everything else that makes up the universe of the story. That could be stuff like character history and development. Some people say that plot is more about physical movement from point a to b, but the story is more about the emotional and character development and so on. I think there's some debate about the exact definitions, but that is what I learned. It's not something you really need to know unless you are a writer or some kind of storyteller, visual or otherwise.

Um, here's a better definition from somebody more eloquent than me: http://cinemoose.com/plot-vs-story/

Elliot, I think she was using the word in the correct context. I believe she genuinely thought I was looking down on her for not knowing this. I wasn't, especially because its a difficult distinction to make.

Sonicallysensitive, please don't.

I was joking with my second comment