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Friends getting too close

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Intravenus
Tufted Titmouse
Tufted Titmouse

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Joined: 30 Apr 2012
Age: 34
Gender: Female
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01 May 2012, 4:47 am

Does anyone else have this problem?
I'd say I'm a nice person, I'm friendly, kind, I have an OK sense of humour, so I can make friends fairly well. It's just keeping them!
I'm happy chatting online or texting, but phone chatting is a no-no.. Or they keep inviting me to clubs, which I can manage if I'm with my boyfriend (who knows what I'm like and handles me!) but I don't think I could do with others..

So I keep making friends then pushing them away. I just wish people didn't try and push me or guilt trip me into things..



BMctav
Snowy Owl
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01 May 2012, 5:19 am

Intravenus wrote:
Does anyone else have this problem?
I'd say I'm a nice person, I'm friendly, kind, I have an OK sense of humour, so I can make friends fairly well. It's just keeping them!
I'm happy chatting online or texting, but phone chatting is a no-no.. Or they keep inviting me to clubs, which I can manage if I'm with my boyfriend (who knows what I'm like and handles me!) but I don't think I could do with others..

So I keep making friends then pushing them away. I just wish people didn't try and push me or guilt trip me into things..


So that's phone and clubs (do you mean nightclubs?) which are not good for you, but have you tried other activities maybe like tea shops, museums or whatever? You don't have to like all the same things to be friends, just enough to have one or two shared interests that you can enjoy together, I think.



piroflip
Deinonychus
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Joined: 20 Aug 2008
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01 May 2012, 5:38 am

Yes I have the same problem.
I'm not shy and could talk to a new neighbour (for instance) without problem.
The difficulty is in taking the social relationship onto the next level.
It never happens and that new neighbour remains a "stranger" for years.



Intravenus
Tufted Titmouse
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Joined: 30 Apr 2012
Age: 34
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01 May 2012, 5:45 am

I guess maybe it's my age. Not many friends have much money, and want to spend what they have on going out to clubs.
I guess I kinda feel a lot of them don't see boundaries like I do. I need to meet more people similar to me. My friends seem to want to live in each other's pockets, then get offended when I pull away.



NicoleG
Veteran
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05 May 2012, 12:44 am

Yes, you need to find new friends that are more in-line with your interests.