Friend/Enemy

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Anyone else have a hard time deciphering which is which?

Maybe I just have a poor judge of character...it always takes me so long to realize certain friends have it out for me! It's as if I put up a mental block to hurtful things they do/say. I won''t recognize their ill-intent until someone else points it out to me and I reflect on it for awhile.

Anyone else know what I mean? How do you screen your friends?

When VH1 had all those reality shows on they coined a new word called "frienemy." This is a person who is supposedly your friend, but is always doing underhanded things to make your life miserable, like hitting on your boyfriend/girlfriend, "forgetting" their wallet when you go out together, or giving you compliments that actually sound like insults.

I used to think the kids who beat me up were my friends and as I got older, teenager, I though the people who used me and never stood up for me or treated me okey, were my friends. But as an adult I know what friendship is like, and I demand to be treated with respect always.
What you're describing sound like my teen years.

Anyone who hits on your girlfriend/boyfriend to undermine your influence on you is not a friend at all and needs to be kept in check.
Anyone who "forgets their wallet" and has money is just an ***hole anyway, especially if they never make it up to you.
Anyone who says that their insults towards you should be considered a compliment is not a friend either.
Two of the above three sound like tactic of a pickup artist anyway.
Anyone who calls you only when they need something from you is an acquaintence, provided they treat you right in that respect. Acquaintences don't last long though.
Anyone who tells you what they think you want to hear, rather than what you need to hear (the truth) is not a friend either.

people who were hitting me badly with sticks, scales and roller pins were my parents and i considered them my parents.
i allowed them to dictate my life, major life decisions for me and who should be my friends etc.

Ultimately nobody wanted to be my friends....because the so called alcoholic, chronically sick parents would keep checking on them, barge into their houses unannounced, call them up frequently, keep following them and me.

It got so creepy that i never had friends till the time i lived with my parents and now when i live with my husband i dont know how to make friends its become too late....

but yes most of the people can make out that i am dumb and people pleaser they can actually manipulate me and extract things from me.....i dont blame them since i am so low on self esteem and self confidence.