Dealing with Friends

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I find myself extremely crippled in this area. Not to say that I am not social or do not like or want friends or that I do not have any friends. I have a friend I love very much. But I find myself in a very difficult spot all the time. I will make people angry and have no nothing why this occurred. I know sometimes I can talk to much or be a little obsessive or cut people off in conversation. This is something I have been working on and I have less trouble with these days.

But there are things that cause tension that I do not understand and I do not understand what causes them.

Here is an example. I do a lot of the cooking at home between me and my friend, because I like to cook. Today I was getting ready to go get a snack, before I did homework.

friend: why don't you actually cook something if you are hungry?
me: I am not hungry enough for a meal I just want a cruhcy snack.
friend: i am sure that if i ask you to cook me something you will make something for yourself too
me: not really I am not hungry
friend: then can you make me two pieces of fish and some tots?
me: sure
friend: make some for you to
me: i dont want fish
friend: you are not near your period, sure you do
me: i am not that hungry
friend . . .okay.

I go out there and eat my snack while I am making her meal (which I enjoy doing. She comes out and talks to me about how she got her computer space cleaned out. I was surprised that she had a game she got rid off that was 20 gigs.

friend: i had already told you that in the bedroom
me: i must have still been typing homework, i didn't remember it (i have problems paying attention to conversation when I am NOT busy, let alone when I am.
friend: you had already finished, because you where drawing
me: well it did not take me that long to draw
friend: i told you right before you showed me your drawing
me: i must have missed it, how did you know i was already drawing
friend: because I pay attention (walks away)

She has been really quiet since then, even sat her pc with headphones on. I am not sure what I did wrong and I asked her if she was ok, if something was wrong, she just said she was okay. She got up and did the dishes, which she knows I do after I cook, after i finish what I had started (homework). She only said, they need to get done. And it made me feel weird, because they where not done right then, it upset her? I am not sure.

I get into situations like this, all the time, and to this day, I do not understand what elements I am missing. Is it some non-verbal stuff I am not seeing in her demeanor? Am I reading too much into things or not enough? Anyone got insights? I like to avoid situations like this, because I do not like to end up looking mean or rash or like I do this sort of thing, this instigating, on purpose.

Edit: I cannot approach this by telling her there is something I did not understand because she does not really believe in things like Autism, not unless you are obviously impaired. If the problem is not obvious ,the person must have control over themselves and does things on purpose. I just want to know of a way to handle this that would not involve me talking directly about asd.

edited