I keep getting tricked by people. Having no friends sucks.

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I've think I've had one or two friends in my life. Not really best friends either, just people I did things with daily or semi daily basis.

I always had trouble making friends as a kid. I'm now 25,but in elementary school I'd go up to other picks my age and ask them, trying to be their friend, "Do you want to be my friend?" Well, this didnt end well. My dad said to tell them "In your ear with a tractor gear" when they responded unfavorably. I did. this just made it worse. I often sat on the benches in elementary school and just cried, because I didn't know how to make friends. I sat there alone. It was hard. I still...just don't know what to to do even today. I can have chit chat with people, once I get started, although its very one sided. Sometimes they get a chance to talk. the hardest part is knowing when to talk. How to talk...etc. I remember clearly sitting under a tree in 4th grade crying , with my glasses on. Some girl came up to me and asked me what was wrong. I just told her I felt sad. I remember back then playing marbles with other kids on the playground, but never really making any friends , lest maintaining any!

Also, when I try to make friends, it my nativity keeps getting with the wrong people.

Now people aren't as forgiving as an adult. One day, I was up real late, couldn't sleep, I was up at like 1 am. Went to wal mart and did magic (at 1 am, I was pretty stupid. I'm a magician with coins and sponges). I had been practicing at that point about 7 years, I was around 16. I could be wrong with the age. This was when the PS3 was released. The overnight launch. I met a guy there that did a trick back with knives. He fooled me, and then our so called friendship started.

I always thought he was a friend. He always SEEMed like a cool guy. He always was helpful and nice to me. But he was a felon, and had done bank robbery in the past, and kept telling me to do illegal things like litter, tried to get me to smoke, throw trash out the window, drove very recklessly. Went to parties constantly where the police would be called from the noise and people did drugs (I'm sure), just hung around a bunch of shady people.

Then he wanted me to move in with him. I was pretty excited. All the things he told me about his past, his felonies, bank robberies, etc, were true. I went with him as he tried to get an apartment. He went to place and place again, being rejected to own an apartment because of his criminal past. Eventually, he found this one landlord that would accept him. It must've been pretty bad, as there was a flier nearby saying they accepted sex offenders. I went to the apartment and it was hideous. In no doubt a very bad area. It looked like a real run down part of mexico I've been to.

He couldn't have his name the policy, so they opted to make me the head person in charge. Called a lease or something. I was somehow responsible for everything. I'd never owned an apartment before. He said he'd take care of everything. He couldn't get his name on it, again, due to his criminal past, and they needed someone else to sign. He then said everything my parents told me was a lie,I shouldn't trust them. I believed him, as he was the only person I ever believed to be my friend. Eventually I had a bad feeling about him, and told my parents who got me out of the situation. I think I was 22 then.

I guess people make up all types of stories too. I was on a chat board for depression, I do the martial art of Aikido (similiar to jijutsu) some guy said he did krav maga. This was like 2 days ago. He was telling all these stories about how person after person kept coming in trying to kill him with guns or knives, and he disarmed them. He seemed to know alot about krav maga, but I've never done it and it was probably just clever rhetoric. He said how he took this guys gun's who was pointed at him, popped the clip out, with an audience etc and then disarmed him. He said he knew some sleight of hand, and his "sleight of hand" helped with this.

At that point I had an idea he was making this up. Sleight of hand is mostly not "quick fingers". That's not how it works. What he said makes no sense in our magic terminology.

I really believed him, for like 2 days. I added him to my skype, yay, I had a friend now to talk to. He keeps messaging me now, asking me if I'm there. He could be telling the truth, but it just makes me uneasy. He talked pretty violently, and it kind of reminded me of my other "Friend" I just mentioned.

I also have a time knowing when people are NOT interested in what I have to say. Too often I'll try and fit in a conversation, it doesn't work. This happens in my college japanese class. They just ignore me. continue the conversation without me. I just don't fit into groups?

I do have a few niche groups with my passions/interests that works well when I'm not so busy with college (almost no time now).
Magic/sleight of hand and my Aikido martial arts dojo. That's it really.

As for girlfriends, I've never had any. The closest friendship I had, sadly was with a girl. We were so close, and had so much in common, as well as talked so much, it hurt like a real relationship when she decided to just cut me off with no notice, never could contact her again. I could probably not care about a friend. I just can't seem to make ones with people who are decent, good people. People seem to want to take advantage of me.. I have many friends I could say, but if you mean by people I do things on a daily, even weekly, or semi weekly basis, like go out to eat somewhere, I have none. I know many people though.

So I guess its how you define it. Wanting a girlfriend and never been able to get one because of lack of confidence, depression, flirting skills, etc, has been the most difficult to handle. I can't stand it. I'd like to have a friend and a relationship, all in one.
I don't understand. I have some women friends, they say I'm attractive, we have alot in common, yet they don't want to date me.
Everyone just wants to stay friends. As Kafka puts it, this is exactly how I feel:

"t seems so dreadful to stay a bachelor, to become an old man struggling to keep one's dignity while begging for an invitation whenever one wants to spend an evening in company, to lie ill gazing for weeks into an empty room from the corner where one's bed is, always having to say good night at the front door, never to run up a stairway beside one's wife, to have only side doors in one's room leading into other people's living rooms, having to carry one's supper home in one's hand, having to admire other people's children and not even being allowed to go on saying: 'I have none myself,' modeling oneself in appearance and behavior on one or two bachelors remembered from one's youth.

That's how it will be, except that in reality, both today and later, one will stand there with a palpable body and a real head, a real forehead, that is, for smiting on with one's hand."

I try to numb it out and do other things, and I do. Just it doesn't last forever, and eventually these feelings come back up, like now, haunting me and depressing me. Anti depressants only do so much.

you learn some things through the school of hard knocks, like that it doesn't work to ask, "do you want to be my friend." it's a more subtle process. also that there are a significant minority of folks who will take advantage of you. I was engaged to a guy who hit me in the 80's and whose probable strongest interest in me was my money. he was charming and talented, so it took a lot to finally break up with him.

I never quit trying, though and continued to learn better social skills into mid-life, learning small talk at age 50. I must have dated over 100 people, many of whom I asked out. Either i didn't fall for them or they didn't fall for me. I finally met the sweetest guy and we got married when I was 52. we will have been married four years in may. it's going great. so never give up.

I hated reading that. Really I did, I feel so bad for you.

I've had similar problems all my life (sitting on the bench at school, people abandoning me because I'm social suicide, etc.). I was dumped by my best friend when I started high school because he thought I'd damage his reputation. He had a terrible attitude towards high school, so good riddance.

I've been in the deepest, darkest depths of social despair and come back, so it's not hopeless. I went to counselling, and it helps *a lot*, trust me.

Yeah, your story sounds all too familiar to mine. As Aspies, we're so desperate for human connection sometimes we'll take whatever we can get. This is what my autistic dad did. He married a woman who had a horrible childhood of molestation and manipulation who would eventually become a drug addict and... yeah. I've had some bad friends in the past too. Really bad, actually. Growing up with my mom was hard because she would lie to me and take advantage of me. Incidentally, this is what I thought MOST people were like so I've always had my guard up. Funny thing is, I was right. However, when I was going through a bad period in my life I realized one of my "friends" was actually like this. He was this f****d up guy who was waiting for me to crack so he could "use" me. Eh, it was not very pleasing. I came to realize most people are kind of like this, in that they attempt to get as much out of you as they can, take advantage of you. You always have to have your guard up around most people. Even I'm like this, I will use people to get what I want out of them sooooo I completely understand. When it comes to women, they're not that interesting, actually. Most women are only good for sex, they don't provide much in the way of support for the man or anything. Most relationships aren't these mystical things you see on television. They're boring and involve infrequent sex and what not. Get some counseling to work out your problems and realize what I came to realize, Aspies are no different than anyone else, most of us. Most people desperately want to be around people. Most people feel nervous and ask themselves if they truly belong, are good enough. We Aspies want what everyone else wants, we just don't know how to get it. People buy cars and date women to impress other people, and hate themselves for it. Join a club on your campus with people who share your interests and values, people who want something more out of life. I teamed up with a Christian group and I've been having lots of success. I realized that most people feel they need to be in a group, and are willing to lie to place themselves into that group. When I realized this, people no longer scared me. They seemed rather weak to me, actually; most of them. Get away from these toxic people. These kind of people are adept at finding "desperate" people and will milk you for all they can get.