Meeting up with people- nervous!

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I had a friendship over the last few years which got really complicated- long story but ended up annoying her without realising it and haven't met up with her or called her in nearly a year, but we still text/email. Recently, I asked if she wanted to meet up and she said she would but asked a mutual friend to come too. I have no problem meeting the other person (I sometimes meet up with her anyway) but I find more than one person at a time really difficult, and get really nervous about it. I really don't want to get shaky/nervous when it's the first time I've met up with my friend properly since Christmas 2011, although I saw her at work a few times since then. I also feel really left out when they're together because they have a lot in common and I don't, and I feel really young and immature.

The other problem is that they want to go out for a meal. I'm a bit boring/routine-y about food and eat the same thing every night (porridge or baked beans, neither of which they have in the restaurant they want to go to), and at the same time (5pm and we're meeting at 7pm so the food probably won't be there till 8ish :/ ). I really don't like eating in front of people and get nervous in restaurants because there are so many people there and noise. I've also had an eating disorder since I was 13 which is a lot more controlled now, but it's still a massive trigger for meltdowns, especially when I'm nervous already. No idea what to do! If I don't go, I'll probably lose the friendship but if I do, I might get nervous/shaky, not be able to speak and (worse case scenario) have a meltdown then she'll think I'm really weird and not want to be friends with me anyway. Any advice?

What I do is to try to find out where and which restaurant it is. Get a copy of the menu, by either visiting the place, I hate phoning, study the menu, go back or ask them questions (which I usually feel is annoying). Read up on other peoples opinions about the place and get an informed opinion.

This way, I don't get anxious, I already have more options to choose from because I asked all those annoying questions before. I seem to be more spontaneous and "normal" in front of them. This gives me time to focus on them instead of having to worry about the food and looking like an idiot for ordering something I don't like to eat.

Anyway, that works for me. For the times that I did go out. I guess once you have more dining experience, you could maybe ease up on the preparation every time.

Thanks. I've looked up the menu but a bit worried because the only food there I'd be comfortable eating is soup (it's a pub so meat-heavy and I'm vegetarian), but don't know if that would look strange? I'm also trying to think of questions I can ask in conversation so I don't 'freeze' or start boring them by talking about running or David Bowie which are my current obsessions! Hard though because I haven't spoken to either of them properly in a very long time, and it's the first time my friend has wanted to meet since before she started acting 'off' with me over a year ago so I really don't want to mess it up.

I can't see how the world of today would want to exclude you because you are vegetarian. But I've been wrong plenty of times... I tried searching the internet for other people's opinions on having soup in the summer and nobody had an issue.

Try enjoying the event than being afraid of being judged all the time. Easier said than done