Sarcasm

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Does anyone else feel bad and embarrassed when you don't understand sarcasm/joking and you take the person seriously, but they tell you they are joking/not serious.
I kind of feel deflated every time this happens.

I usually feel angry and embarrassed when I don't "get" sarcasm.

It's a burden.

It used to bother me a lot but not so much anymore. Maybe I get it better than I used from watching TV shows with joking & sarcasm & I also learned from experience to be more skeptical. What bothers me a lot more is the situation going bad that happens because of it or us having an argument which makes me mad. Others also sometimes don't know when I'm joking or being sarcastic & it causes them to get upset & we have an argument or they blow me off which can cause me to get upset.

Nah, I just laugh at myself for it now.

Yes I used to. Then again sarcasm can be used to hurt the other person or bring them down. It is especially hard to someone on the spectrum and so other people seem to think it's funny.

Example-

The last place that I worked, my former boss and everyone else around me used to make sarcastic comments to me if they did care for the way I was acting for talking. One area that I seemed to get a lot of sarcasm from them was over me going to college and them thinking that I thought I was better than everyone else. So they made sarcastic remarks rather than pull me to the side to talk to me. They knew that I am on the spectrum too.

Then a woman who another close friend and I used to associate with was extremely sarcastic and did it to us when it was uncalled for. She was extremely sarcastic once when I walked in the door at a friend's bridal shower about three years ago. She goes, "Oh honey, you don't know this game so you can't play." I thought "Ouch."

I took her seriously too.

I'm usually good at sarcasm but I didn't get that bridal shower comment ??

..
I used to be the dumb kid who got made fun of for being so literal about everything (actually this can still happen), so I applied myself to learning sarcasm as you'd learn a language. Now it comes out automatically but I don't try and be mean about it, it's just usually a way for me to make fun of a concept or situation that would otherwise irritate me or make me angry.

Also, NTs can find directness unbearably rude in some cultures, (like in the UK) so all these other ways of conveying how you feel about something or what you think become necessary. Such is life.

My family was really sarcastic growing up. It caused a lot of problems. Now I can usually understand when someone is being sarcastic...I think. When I don't understand it I just usually say, "Oh" because it's obviously not funny to me.

I do it more than I'd like, but I try to just laugh it off. Sometimes they might not even care.

my old boss's humor was mainly sarcasm...took a while for me to figure it out, but thankfully he always made the same physical moves...I think he also thinks I am a freak, took to long for me to get it

sarcasm is something I try avoid, people tell me I am too serious, but I can't help it. I do try to understand and not be so "knee jerk" , just takes a bit

Sarcasm is the lowest form of humor. I "get" it, but it just isn't funny.

I'm feeling really down about this tonight because I can't figure out if someone online insulted me or not. It's frustrating because sarcasm is even harder to detect when it's written. I made a creative-type post, and they responded agreeing with my post, except they started with "ALL RIGHT BUT" and then continued on no longer in caps and seemingly positive. The beginning has completely thrown me. I responded as if it was a compliment, but I have this sick feeling that I'm being made a fool of. I always assume the worst (I was picked on a lot as a kid).

Anyway, stumbling on this thread has made me feel a little better just to be reminded that I am not the only one that is confused by these things. Thank you for posting this.

If the person lets me in on the joke, and tells me they were joking, it's totally fine. I do the same, I'm a very sarcastic person. But, if the person DOESN'T let me know they're joking, then they're just messing with me, and I feel like a fool.

Coming from a sarcastic person, I sometimes just expect people to know I'm joking, and I've realized that isn't right. It's on me to make sure people know I'm joking and to not have anyone feel like an ass. Sarcastic people have certain responsibilities:)

I feel bad when I don't get a joke or sarcasm. I hear often "I was just kidding," from people. I knew I spoke the truth almost always and that somehow jokes were forms of lies, which I couldn't form by myself.

Not getting the joke or sarcastic comment is something which weighs heavy on me for hours or even days. I don't like remembering that instance vividly for days to come as somehow representative of the entire day, or entire interaction with whichever person the sarcastic moment occured.

I too feel similar pain.