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the_alchemist
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02 Oct 2013, 11:11 am

The things you say to all these folks all seem to challenge them. Seem to indicate to them there was something wrong with what they said to you, and put them on the spot about it. This might be a defensive habit? It certainly creates confrontation.

Suppose, every time you have thought of something to say, you filter it to remove content that puts the other person under a challenge to defeend what they have said to you?



Summer_Twilight
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02 Oct 2013, 11:27 am

Solvejg wrote:
I discovrred when I was in my teens if I drank lots, and did silly stuff, people like me.

When I am sober, I have no social skills. I have a facisl expression people find condisenfing and my language skills are considerably lacking. I know lots of facts and quotes and seem to let them loose at very inappropriate times. From the years I have spent intoxicated, my social skills have gotten even worse to the point people actively talk in hearing distance of how much they hate me. I have little desire to make friends but it would be nice to not have people openly hate me.

Eg today. A really fashionable girl said to me that she liked my outfit and not many girls can make nerd look good. I responded with "in the words of ian malcom, there is nothing more tedious then fashion except maybe professional sports." Apperantly that was insulting her as she likes fashion. ???

This is very annoying. 8O


For one thing if you drink, it will drive other people away. I learned that one the hard way about 10 and a half years ago when I lived with two roommates who were heavy drinkers and that not seem to want me around because I was so much younger, immature, and different. So I had attended one of their major parties and got drunk in thinking they would like me if I drank like them. So I got stark raving drunk right? That roommate hosting the party was so mad and embrassed that she made comments that I needed to clean the toilet because I vomited in it.

I also drank about others rejecting me and it felt good at the time but then the problems were right there all over again.

So the point is, alchohol will solve nothing for you but make the problems worse for you. It is also sounds like you are abusing a substance to feel better to avoid the problem rather than solve it. While I am sorry this happened, a counselor might be a good option for you. They can better tell you how to deal with your problems.

As for the fashionable girl, I have no idea what she said after so i cannot judge but it does sound like sarcasm.



Solvejg
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03 Oct 2013, 1:38 am

Summer_Twilight wrote:
Solvejg wrote:
I discovrred when I was in my teens if I drank lots, and did silly stuff, people like me.

When I am sober, I have no social skills. I have a facisl expression people find condisenfing and my language skills are considerably lacking. I know lots of facts and quotes and seem to let them loose at very inappropriate times. From the years I have spent intoxicated, my social skills have gotten even worse to the point people actively talk in hearing distance of how much they hate me. I have little desire to make friends but it would be nice to not have people openly hate me.

Eg today. A really fashionable girl said to me that she liked my outfit and not many girls can make nerd look good. I responded with "in the words of ian malcom, there is nothing more tedious then fashion except maybe professional sports." Apperantly that was insulting her as she likes fashion. ???

This is very annoying. 8O


For one thing if you drink, it will drive other people away. I learned that one the hard way about 10 and a half years ago when I lived with two roommates who were heavy drinkers and that not seem to want me around because I was so much younger, immature, and different. So I had attended one of their major parties and got drunk in thinking they would like me if I drank like them. So I got stark raving drunk right? That roommate hosting the party was so mad and embrassed that she made comments that I needed to clean the toilet because I vomited in it.

I also drank about others rejecting me and it felt good at the time but then the problems were right there all over again.

So the point is, alchohol will solve nothing for you but make the problems worse for you. It is also sounds like you are abusing a substance to feel better to avoid the problem rather than solve it. While I am sorry this happened, a counselor might be a good option for you. They can better tell you how to deal with your problems.

As for the fashionable girl, I have no idea what she said after so i cannot judge but it does sound like sarcasm.


Actually when i was drinking i was the opposite. I had everyone liking me and huge group of friends. I had like 20+ invitations for events a week and i was the type of person that got invited everywhere first. You know the class clown quirky fun free chick.

Meh. I have had a taste of popularity that lasted years and now have no desire to return as i can't remember half of it. :lol:


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Codyrules37
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03 Oct 2013, 8:35 am

what about your parents?

what about your grandparents?

what about Jesus?



b9
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03 Oct 2013, 8:40 am

Quote:
Everyone hates me.

that can not be true because not everyone knows you.



equestriatola
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03 Oct 2013, 11:28 pm

This much I know: I am NOT hated by everyone. I sometimes like to think so, however.


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Solvejg
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04 Oct 2013, 5:27 am

Codyrules37 wrote:
what about your parents?

what about your grandparents?

what about Jesus?


My parents do.

My grandparents are dead

And I do not know no mexican farmers. :lol:


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auntblabby
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04 Oct 2013, 2:10 pm

^^^
* rimshot *



skcuf
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10 Oct 2013, 2:22 pm

I understand why these people hate you and I'm trying to explain it to you.

STOP TRYING TO PLEASE OTHER PEOPLE.

That's it. You say you don't care if you're liked but come online and make a thread about how people don't like you. Your please for attention are what is annoying. You aren't yourself anymore because when you say you're trying to be yourself you're only doing it to please someone else. The reason people seemed to like you more when you were drinking is because A. You were drinking... and B. You were relaxed and probably not trying to please people as much.

Do you do anything for yourself? Do you have any hobbies? Or is your main activity complaining to people about how no one likes you?

A hint: If you're complaining all the time people won't want to talk to you. Maybe try and listen to some of the advice on here and stop acting like a fool. I don't know what kind of relationship you have with your parents that you assume they hate you but I'm guessing that is crap too and it's all in your head.



Codyrules37
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11 Oct 2013, 2:17 pm

yea Everyone is a jerk. I would know because Everyone was in my gym class. I got bullied by Everyone everyday. Everyone was just a pain the ass. Everyone made my life miserable.



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20 Oct 2013, 7:06 pm

I used to have a k2/weed and alcohol problem because it made socializing much easier. Now that I'm sober I find that socializing is much more difficult.

I gave up a long time ago. I'm going to live alone. Miserably, admittedly, but (shrug).



Kimbrah
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20 Oct 2013, 11:52 pm

Solvejg wrote:

If someone said something about my eyes I would probably say something like "and the motivation behind this comment is?"


I am an NT. if someone compliments you, they are most likely trying to make friends with you!



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26 Oct 2013, 4:45 am

A word to the wise. Alcohol might seem to be the answer in the short term but trust me, it'll eventually take you down to rock bottom. Dutch courage through alcohol isn't your answer. It isn't anyone's answer. Self awareness is.
pride and self respect is a much more healthy and satisfying path to go down. You might want to consider your answers a little more before sticking your mouth into gear but ultimately, you may find people who prefer your blunt Aspie honesty and you'll wind up with far more genuine relationships.
good luck.


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30 Oct 2013, 4:37 pm

I don't drink alcohol myself, but I get an idea of this-I sympathise with you. People can be annoying and very close minded.
About the compliments, it makes me feel good when someone says that they find me good looking, but the compliments about looks are not enough. I mean, I like when someone appreciates my intelligence too. Those both compliments....So, I agree with everything you've said about compliments too.
It seems that they don't understand at all, though :)



Sherry221B
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30 Oct 2013, 4:59 pm

I don't drink alcohol myself, but I get an idea of this-I sympathise with you. People can be annoying and very close minded.
About the compliments, it makes me feel good when someone says that they find me good looking, but the compliments about looks are not enough. I mean, I like when someone appreciates my intelligence too. Those both compliments....So, I agree with everything you've said about compliments too.
It seems that they don't understand at all, though :)