How would you respond in this situation?

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The woman who works as the receptionist in the building I live in has a brother who passed away suddenly last week, and so she's taken the week off and won't be back until Monday. I like her, and she likes me - I think it's bcuz I don't just walk right by her desk on my way to somewhere else as if she's just part of the furniture or invisible like a lot of other students seem to (Interestingly enough, while I epically fail at making friends with anyone in my immediate peer group, I make friends easily with homeless people, custodial staff, receptionists - people that other folks normally just ignore) We always chat briefly with each other in the mornings (unless of course either one or both of us is busy) and I think she sometimes welcomes the distraction of me chatting with her.

So, when I see her again on Monday, what should I say to her? Should I mention anything about it at all? Should I give her a card or something? I never know what to do or say in these kinds of situations beyond saying something like, "I'm so sorry," or "I'm here for you."

Any thoughts or suggestions are welcome!

Knowing me, I'd say something like, "Welcome back to the land of the living" or "Welcome back to the land of the lost", depending on where both of your sentiments lied. If she looks like she's still upset because of the death, I'd just limit it to "Welcome back."

Get her some neutral flowers (maybe delivered) maybe a card, "sorry for your loss."
Tell her the place was just a little more boring without her there.

Just don't get her a condom bouquet. Yet.

I think a sympathy card is appropriate.

I would great her when she returns with condolences for her loss. You could certainly offer your support to her by saying something like "if you need anything or just someone to talk to, I am here for you" but don't press to hard.

I'd say "I'm so sorry for your loss. How are you doing?" then listen and say something like "If there's anything I can do, please let me know". I know that sounds sort of like you don't mean it, but there really isn't much somebody can do unless they are very close to the person. Just saying that to her will let her know you care and are thinking of her. I wouldn't give her a card unless you normally give her Christmas cards or something or you two talk a good bit and are on a first name basis.

[quote="redrobin62"]OOM? Is that you? People have been worried sick over your disappearance these past couple of months. Nice to see you're still with us. [/quote]

Yep, it's me. I've posted once or twice, and true to form got mad once and said I wasn't coming back. But of course, I did.

I have actually been very busy crocheting. I love to crochet and I've been making lots and lots of things. Then I made my son's Halloween costume and that took a solid 48 hours of work. I just haven't been online much at all. Mainly, the kids have been on the computer instead. I go through phases like that, where I just don't bother with the internet. I'm here right now though. How you been?

Maybe just some decently nice flowers (no roses), and a "Good to see you back." Simple, yet effective.

Hi, everyone - first of all, I want to thank everybody for their responses/ideas! It means a lot to me that you took the time to answer my question.

Here's what happened when I saw the receptionist this morning...we exchanged hellos, and I gave her a Christmas cookie I'd been saving for her. Then I said, "I'm very sorry to hear about your brother," and then she thanked me, and told me a bit about what the funeral was like, how she felt in the aftermath, and the events leading up to his death - and I just stood there and listened as she spoke. I could tell that she was on the verge of tears from talking about it, and I felt bad, even though I knew I was doing good just being there for her - I just felt bad cuz I felt like her telling me about it was making her sad all over again; and I hadn't wanted that to happen.

Then someone else who works the desk came over and gave her a hug, and I asked if I could give her a hug too, and she said she would like that, so we hugged, and then I told her that if she ever just needed to talk, I'd be there. And then we said our goodbyes and I went to class. I hope I made her feel at least a little better.

Ah.........never mind, this already transpired. Sounds like it went well, OP I'm glad for ya.