I have a hard time opening up to people

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(Just for info on me: I'm not diagnosed with Autism or Asperger's. I've had anxiety issues and depression off and on my entire life. When I was younger I used to wash my hands so much that the skin would dry out and bleed. I've had panic attacks, including in the middle of class where everyone watched. I've had suicidal thoughts. I used to be on an antidepressant but stopped, and I'm considering getting back on it.)

I'm a reserved, introverted and private person. I'm also socially awkward. In the friendships I've had, I have a hard time opening up and letting my guard down. I don't trust people easily. I couldn't say who my best friend is because I haven't ever really had a best friend. I've had close-ish friends, but it was usually because we shared a common interest. Most of my friends from school have moved on, but we stay in touch on Facebook and email. I don't have friends I talk to every day or on a regular basis.

What would all your advice be for opening up to friends about your personal life, and letting your guard down? I've always had a hard time with that.

You have to if you want to make it out of your own personal nut shell. and because no woman or man would want you as long as your showing so much personal baggage. if your female its not so bad, just get out, the men will hit on you, if your male, your screwed unless you get some counseling..

Look at it this way, its your life, screw what others think.
You will never get what you want unless you try.

Last edited by AspergianMutantt on 20 Mar 2014, 1:00 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Sorry, how am I "showing so much personal baggage"? I thought this was an anonymous site where people could post what they wanted to. I guess I don't understand what you meant by that.

I am sorry, I was off in thought about other subjects, then I reread what you posted. I was being bias and I apologies.


That is a hard one for even me to say, I am much the same way as you. same boat. all I can say is that, after living so long (I am almost 52), people are not worth the time if they don't click with you, they have all their own lives and you have yours, just keep moving foreword and realize if those friends you had felt you were worth it they would try and hold onto you too. otherwise just keep moving foreword and ignore what most people think.

Let me put it this way, if life were but a dream, then its your dream to live. stop being afraid and just live it. in the end the only one who is truly judging your life is your self.. if you never try you will have regrets. you have nothing to lose other then the hardening of your heart, as you await the person who will come break it down enough for you to believe in them. which shows them truly worthy, and worthy of you.

my issues are mostly that of honesty and boundaries. but imagine, if I met someone the same. we could click.
no matter how hard I try and put my odds into percentiles, it all comes out the same, the best odds are with a positive attitude and to smile against all odds. You only have one life to live how do you want to live it? if you don't try your doomed to fail.

Hi

My heart really goes out to you. I was in the same position but two things really helped me to open up and trust.

1. Therapy

Well actually I should say therapy with the right therapist. Don't be afraid to shop around, I saw over half a dozen therapists for a session so I could find one I reall really connected with. Also go to one who understands Autism and Asperger's Syndrome because that really helps you to connect with them. And remember you are auditioning them as much as they are auditioning you. You want to find someone you can connect to or at least you think you can connect to further along down the line. It won't be immediate and may take weeks/months.

2. Massage

I felt like I was armoring my body against the next painful experience around the next corner. It wasn't an easy life. And when your body is tense because your out with other people in the world and you can't wait to get home to relax and be alone. And I don't know about you but a lot of emotion came out and it made my body feel so fluid it was like I was Fred Astaire.

I am the evidence this worked for me and for some reason people can't help but open up and approach me. So please try. As for medication, a therapist can help you can make a decision if medication will be a help or a hindrance. I have been on meds for a long time and it helps to stabilize me and I dont catastrophise as much but everyone is different.

Yeah I had stinges and everything too. Also the youngest of all my brothers and cousins but life goes on and you just have to open up to the right people.