Friend Vs Acquaintance
OK so growing up I had a total of two friends one whom I grew up with and hardly talk with these days and another friend whom I knew for 3-4 months before relocating to a different state
In recent years I have stopped using the term "friend" but rather opting for the word Acquaintance as I don't feel that anybody these days is a true friend to me but rather somebody to kill an hour or two with.
So I'd like to hear your opinions on what qualifies as a person to be real friend vs some one who's just acquaintance
_________________
"I really wish I was less of a thinking man and more of a fool not afraid of rejection." ~ Billy Joel
a friend is someone who reaches out to me (as opposed to me always doing the initiating)
a friend is someone who reaches out to me even when they don't want something (can you do this or that for me)
a friend is someone who I can depend on
a friend is someone who doesn't judge
I have no friends based on the above
JerryM
Sea Gull
Joined: 21 May 2014
Age: 37
Gender: Male
Posts: 244
Location: A pillowy cloud in the place dreams are made
My uncle always impressed upon me the difference between a "friend" and a "true friend", which is more or less what you're describing as an "acquaintance vs friend". So I'll switch around the terminology.
*An acquaintance will ask you how your day was. A friend can tell before you open your mouth.
*An acquaintance, when you tell them about a problem, will tell you what you want to hear, rather than the solution. A friend will tell you what's best for you, even if it means you're mad or you don't want to hear it.
*An acquaintance will chit chat with you when you come up to them and say hey. A friend will call you up at home to see how you're doing.
*An acquaintance will be there when it's convenient for them. A friend will be the only person standing by your side when you majorly mess up.
I've only really had one true friend in my life. But I appreciate everything she does.
Friends are the people I actually enjoy spending time with, and willingly divulge information about myself to. These are exceedingly rare (I have two right now). Acquaintances are people I know but won't make an effort to be around. These are mostly friends of friends, coworkers, etc.
Friendship like all other relationship is need based, whats in it for me, whats common between us,
what can you give me
A child expects mother to care for him/her, a husband expects wife to cook food, clean the house,
a wife expects hubby to provide financially
similarly in friendship we expect person to entertain us, whatever time we spend together should
be fun, they expect to go shopping, go movie watching and in this have fun rather nobody wants
to hear sob stories expect those who themself experience some sad events or similar events
till date i havent made a friend who was extrovert, having fun, i have got friends who had troubles,
who were depressed, who were frustrated.
i could be their shoulder to cry, they also understood me, in this also many of them tricked me
they used me but yes they were introverts so they moved on through time
_________________
The only thing right in this wrong world is
WRONG PLANET
Gracey72
Blue Jay
Joined: 14 May 2013
Gender: Female
Posts: 90
Location: Somewhere, Northern Ireland, United Kingdom
An acquaintance is somebody who you have to do all the arranging to meet up, otherwise you won't hear from or see them any more, even though they enjoy meeting up with you.
A friend is somebody who gives you a call or text of their own accord, suggesting to meet up. Even if meeting is few and far between because of being busy with your own lives, making time to text or phone each other should not be much of a problem.
An acquaintance will only talk to you in the place you met, like at work, and would not suggest to meet up with you out of that place. Also they won't ask for your number, if they do you probably won't hear from them.
A friend will want to see you out of the place you met, and also want to have your number.
For me, people come and go. I have thought I made friends before, then it feels more like an acquaintanceship, then they just turn into fair-weather friends until I don't hear from them any more, even though I try to keep in touch. But I have been rejected so much during my teenage years that I think it has set me back and has made me become afraid to get too close to people. I think people can sense that I am keeping a distance (although I don't intend to), and so they think I don't want the pressure of a friendship or something, so they just keep it at an acquaintanceship, which can exist for a long time and could turn into a close friendship, but mostly fizzle out.
Sometimes I lie and tell people that I do have a group of friends that I see frequently and do things with, just to that it looks like I'm not some sort of loner. But then by doing that, I can't tell people that I am feeling lonely, and I have learnt that sometimes when you tell people that you feel like you don't have a friend in the world, really nice people may suggest you come out for a drink with them or something. So, it's a bit of a catch-22.
_________________
Female
A friend is somebody who gives you a call or text of their own accord, suggesting to meet up. Even if meeting is few and far between because of being busy with your own lives, making time to text or phone each other should not be much of a problem.
An acquaintance will only talk to you in the place you met, like at work, and would not suggest to meet up with you out of that place. Also they won't ask for your number, if they do you probably won't hear from them.
A friend will want to see you out of the place you met, and also want to have your number.
I like your explanation. Based upon this, I currently have 2 friends. All others are simply acquaintances who I associated with out of convenience, boredom or routine.
I also had this feeling of being rejected when I was young (both during pre-teen and teenage years). Most people (other than the quirky ones) quickly realized I was a bit different and simply preferred not to be associated with me.
I do remember trying to pretend I was not the loner, I really was. So, at school, when others were socializing during breaks, I would find places to hide (e.g. computer lab, library, etc.).
What's the differences between close friends and casual friends and wouldn't work friends just be termed as colleagues?
_________________
"I really wish I was less of a thinking man and more of a fool not afraid of rejection." ~ Billy Joel
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