Coming out

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I've started trying to go out and do more things. I've started going out with Neurotypical friends and meeting their other neurotypical friends. Actually, I've really enjoyed it. We've gone out to eat, and to see movies, etc. But there are some things that they talk about that I can't, or won't, rather. I know they think I'm weird. And I really do have a legit reason to be weird. So my question is, should I tell people, if we get close enough, that I have Asperger's? Even if we get to be really good friends, should I tell them?

i can count on one hand the people outside doctors and family who know i'm autistic.

I've told virtually no one that I have AS since being diagnosed five years ago, and have been petrified of people finding out. I've recently started seeing a counsellor who has pointed out that I don't have to either tell no one or tell everyone - I am in control of who I tell and how much information I give them.

I had a bad experience in the past with people deserting me or treating me badly once I told them I had depression, which hasn't helped. I think if I get close to someone they should be told though, otherwise I'm not being honest with them. Maybe the answer is to get to know people first and get a feel for how likely they are to react before telling them? If they dump me because of it, maybe I don't need that kind of person in my life anyway ...

Sorry for talking about myself rather than you. I do see the problem and it's one I've been struggling with myself.

It's nice that you're hanging out with some NT's. Have any of your NT friends scolded you for a social mistake that you made? If you've made any social mistakes, and feel that it's a result of Asperger's, then you should tell them that you have Asperger's syndrome, briefly explain what it is, apologize for your mistakes, and ask them to tell you the dos and dont's of social interactions.

And why do you think some NT's think you're weird?

I mean, we can all agree as aspies that NTs think we are weird. And to them, we are. I don't think I've really made and HUGE social mistakes, but I stutter an I get very awkward around other NTs out of this small circle. I'm awkward around servers in restaurants and sometimes it's a struggle to even order the food, let alone make small talk at the table waiting for the food to arrive. Then, because of my sensory issues, the loudness of the restaurants make it even worse. I flinch and cringe at loud noises. They think I'm a freak. I know it.

I've disclosed my aspergers to my girlfriend and three friends of mine who happened to be there for me when I was getting the diagnosis. One of my good friends was the one who suggested I might have it as he noticed some of the traits. I did disclose it to my immediate family, but the only one who didn't judge was my brother. My mom still is in denial of the fact I have it. My counselor knows, and that's all of the people that really are aware. I only tell people if I feel close enough to trust them and know that they won't use it against me.

I'm pretty secretive as far as disclosing is concerned. Anything condition with a person's name seems serious to a lot of people.

i have only told a few people i have aspergers.
but somehow, it gets out, and everyone knows there's something "wrong" with me, somehow.
"half the school thinks you're ret*d"
"ALL OF VADA KNOWS YOU'RE AUTISTIC"
and i didn't tell a single one of them.
but all of my friends and acquaintances are NT. in fact, i don't believe i've met a single person with ASD in my entire life.

Same here. I live in a very rural area; unfortunately I don't really have the option of meeting up with many people who are on the autism spectrum. People think I'm odd anyway, so I go ahead and tell them what's up. Some of them act like I am a leper or something, but eff them, they are ignorant and not worth my time. I think the best course of action is to just let people you become close to know (at the appropriate time of course) and let the chips fall where they may. The people who are worth your time will stick around and the people who aren't will scatter. It may hurt sometimes when someone you really like rejects you, but I think you are usually better off in the long run.

I am odd, different and boring
people dont want to be around me
i dont force them too
but being socially cut off i am not able to learn social skills
i keep making mistakes and adding to my woes my hubby is ignorant of social cues
he enforces stupid actions on me which makes us both socially vulnerable

i wont go to tell people about my issues and usually when they get a hint i am different
or odd they usually cut of them self
so i dont find a need to tell them things
people who stick around me are mostly sticking around for some personal gain
they want to use me and get their work done
once their work is done they cut off

in your case i would say the moment you feel uncomfortable around your new NT friends
you keep distance
rather then wait for the moment when they will cut you off