How to decline conversion

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Im really trapped ive been attending my uncle's church as the people there are really nice and the music is brilliant.... well ive been attending because my uncle gets indignant if I dont lol. Anyway I didnt make it clear that I dont want to be baptiseed. I sort of said that they'd have to convince me. Now I think there's an expectation that I will eventually. Im going to have to inform them at some point that its not going to happen but I havent a clue how to go about this.

A complicating factor is the density of the social network. My uncle is a minister in another church so if im delared to be a willul heathen I bring shame on his head.Im not going to pretend either.

p.s. in order to be baptised you have to agree with all the tenets of their faith. Its a shame because its a genuinely warm and sincere community.

well it depends if you want to go a direct approach or to a nondirect approach.

direct would be, no thank you i do not want to be baptised. this would not necessarily end conversion attempts but it would make your position clear.

indirect i think would be a sort of hedging statement like 'i dont think thats a commitment i can make at this time in my life', or i'm exploring other religious options.

it sounds liek a very hard situation and that they will be upset regardless of how you phrase it. i wish you luck.

Cults, religions, etc operate in the same way. They portray a 'grass is greener here' to outsiders and use social pressure to 'enlist' them into the group. Once you're in the group you realize most of that is fake and the members simply fake it all to keep being part of the group itself (for whatever benefits it brings).

If you're not into the religion then it would be best to distance yourself from that community. Think about it: If they wont accept you for who you are and want you to be like them... are they really respecting you or are they merely trying to fulfill their agenda?

Just last week I learned that a girl whom I worked with and admired greatly (and had a crush on her) had married a pastor that runs one of those 'conversion-mills'. I bumped into her while grocery shopping and we had time to chat and catch up after not seeing each other for almost 5 years.

The smart, self-reliant, efficient and open minded person I had met had become a 'god this' 'god that' person that relied on faith and her husband's 'orders' to get through the day that said things like homosexuals were sinners, that single mothers were dirty, etc,etc.

I mean.. WOW. Talk about brainwashing. All this merely to become part of some super-exclusive club of people that praised an entity nonstop all day and basically blindly followed whatever one very shifty-looking guy said.

Its kind of expected that I go to church unfortunately.I cant really stop going as my uncle is already annoyed with me for something or other. I call him the "Mystery machine" because I have no idea what goes through his head

Being unpredictable is a control tactic. You're being manipulated on levels you can't even see.

Can you move away? I think you're in danger, re brainwashing. This is very sophisticated stuff.

You could read Trauma and Recovery - you'll see yourself in it, I think. Maybe you can get away from there.

The title of that book speaks of violence but it's about the kind of thing that you're facing too - they describe it detail by detail. Like unpredictability. They'll tell you you're free to choose until you put your foot down.

You cannot decline conversion (and the endless tests thereafter) and remain in that Identity Group.
That's the whole point of "baptisms."

Im in one of those brooding seething moods you develop from a million cumulative annoyances and stresses. I was extremely busy over the weekend and during the week so I declined to go to church and to a group meeting. The lady who drops in on me ~(the convertor it might seem) didnt reply to my text giving my excuses on sunday. Im also extremely extremely ticked off with my uncle who is being inscrutable silent and uncommunicative. I cant get him to explain what it is that ive been doing wrong since I got here so ive basically given up. I was only going to church to appease him so now that ive given up trying there's no reason for me to go through the stress and strain every weekend. I'll be straight up honest and tell them that I love homos I love hindus and I dont believe in hell there is no point in even trying to convert me.

Thanks for all the advice, it helps knowing that its not me against the might of two (yes 2!) churches