overhsaring

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Does anyone have a problem with oversharing and with telling personal details? I have had people complain to me about my emails being way to long, way to overwhelming and filled with my life tales. Plus people seem bothered in person. How do you deal with oversharing?

For a long time I just kept things very, very short. It was really painful. I had to get used to feeling unknown and that I was going to be alone. To me, how could someone know me without knowing everything about me?

I think the oversharing thing comes from loneliness and also from the fact that if you are AS, you depend so much on knowing a person's experiences and being told everything about them verbally so you can "logic" out their being and how they think and feel and are so dependent on that, that you don't realize how much they (NTs) are not dependent on that information to feel connected to another person and to know another person. As I have gotten older, I have learned not to overshare mostly because I am deeply embarrassed afterwards and also because it drives people away There are ways I wish I could communicate with people, like when I really like a certain person, it's like they have music and I want to share that music with them, but I know that that would really creep them out especially when I don't talk to them or look at them and have no outward relationship with them; to them I would have no "reason" to be so attached to them. But then when it comes to expressing these things to someone that I am supposed to like a parent, husband, or child, I can't. I think it is because I have to think so much just to carry on an outward relationship with someone, that I can't do the proper emotional attachment thing.

Journaling helps sometimes. Gets the words and thoughts out. Another problem I have is that I can't say everything I want to say and so when I write, it goes on and on and on. I can be a lot more articulate in writing than in speaking.

I used to do this a lot in the past and I know several people on the spectrum where I can easily tell that this is an issue. It's definitely a spectrum thing. I figure it's because people on the spectrum tend to be detail focused and have trouble knowing what details are most important to share to people and/or not knowing what is appropriate to share with others and what others consider TMI (too much information).