Joe90 wrote:
But I'm just saying that there are NTs out there who are noticeably less empathetic than me and probably a lot of other Aspies, and they still don't get blamed.
I noticed this when learning about the concept of theory of mind. I started watching people and saw that NTs SUCK at theory of mind when it comes to stuff about me. But I "lack" it. Whatever -- clearly the deck is stacked to an NT understanding of the world, while we can read each other much better.
It's like when I was talking to a woman who was scratching near her eye, and I had been taught in France that that was a body language symbol for sarcasm / kidding. I totally misread her signals and eventually just had to come out and ask her if she was trying to signal something to me. (She was American; of course she wasn't. Her eye was itchy.)
When I read people generally, it's based on my own internal memory banks of known human behavior, which is mostly things I know about me (and a few others, like the French one). NTs, I think, are exactly the same, only their memory banks are mostly full of things like them.
So if I'm talking to an aspie and they look away, I think they want to focus on my words. But an NT person might misread that as shyness/disinterest/whatever.
Now extrapolate that simple misreading to the HUGE misunderstandings that come out of making assumptions about aspies based on NT behaviors. And yet, somehow, all misunderstandings are my fault, not theirs.
![Sad :(](./images/smilies/icon_sad.gif)
Oops, that was a rant. Sorry. Well, it's over now.
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Diagnosed with autism spectrum disorder 19 June 2015.