People Cause Problems

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If this is anything, it's a rant. Feel free to ignore.

Every time I do anything with someone it always turns into some kind of argument. Everything with people involves some kind of doublethink where two opposite truths must always be true.

Take for example the saying "be yourself". Everyone everywhere will say you should "be yourself" but if being yourself involves in someway hurting someone else's feelings (and I don't mean just bullying I mean like you had good intentions but "it didn't go well") or disagreeing with someone, you can no longer "be yourself".

Or the simple rule of "you should always tell the truth", but then when someone asks you something and you basically end up hurting their feelings lying would've been the better route instead.

Recently it's gotten to the point of personal taste.

Recently it's been something along the lines of "equality for all" except when you have certain groups of people. Basically if you're overweight, homosexual/bisexual, smoke weed, or whatever else has gotten the medias attention, you get the "equality for all" treatment. If you're not one of those things, you basically get crapped on. If you're violent, mentally different or challenged, asexual, do crack and/or heroine, whatever it is, you're some kind of monster or reject. I fail to see how that is "equality for all". I do predict however that sooner or later these things will make it into the media and get the same treatment, but it will still be becuase "someone else did it".

It's things like this that make it hard to find or keep friends. When you spend a lot of time arguing with people and getting reprimanded for whatever it is they don't like you for, at some point you just get sick of it. You get sick of people.

And the other thing that bothers me about this doublethink is the fact that every time I try to not get involved, people are like this mob of arms that grab me and force me back in to get involved. Either becuase it's "my duty" or "becuase it's what's right" or whatever else they think.

Don't take this the wrong way but the primary thing in my head right now is:

"Death solves all problems - no man, no problem."
- Joseph Stalin

This world is so contradictory, I'm sure we've all done it before.

You have to try and recognize when it is an appropriate time to follow these rules and when not.

I know, it's hard. I'm still figuring it all out.

When it comes to honesty it is best to be as honest as you can but still be considerate.

For example if someone asked you "Does this haircut look bad?", if you think it is the worst haircut you've ever seen, instead of saying "It's f*cking terrible and you're an idiot for choosing it" obviously it would be much better to say something friendlier but true like "I really don't think it's a good haircut, maybe you could change it up a little."

When people say be yourself they mean it in a positive way, be exactly who you are when it comes to your positive side and not your negative..

But yes some people are naturally negative people or angry people or sad people or whatever.

That's why I always thought 'be yourself' was a stupid thing to say too - it is better to say "Be your BEST self"

I don't hang around with people who've watched too much TV and can only think in media-scripted responses. Usually this means I don't hang around with anyone at all, but meh. I'd rather be alone than bothered with all that nonsense.

It does feel like people get angry when I have a different opinion to them eg just recently I said that I think that workers should be paid for their lunch break and my family got really angry with me because I didn't agree with their point of view that they shouldn't. OMG does it really matter? It's not a subject I feel strongly about so why do others get so passionate because I disagree with them? This happens to me a lot and it's worse when it's about an issue I do feel strongly about. People drag me down and I feel better when I don't have to be around them.

ok, in my case it was some people who have a habit of using blame as a means to awaken my mind and responsibility while they do not mean it as an insult

i usually just slow down when i see that happen

then i go through the process of resisting the urge to defend myself, i need to take a few moments to remember that it's their fault that they are being argumentative while trying to deliver their thought

then i try to work out what they really wanted to say -- what the meaningful part of the message was -- and respond to that, slowly, while 'skipping' the rest

hth

I regularly feel like anything in my life that has had to involve other people, doesn't go well for me, while anything that can be just me and no one else involved goes better.