Contacting Friends

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Howdy! Having a wee bit small NT girl problem: I'm sicker than a dog and feel like I'm on my death bed. My Aspie friend knows this and still hasn't texted to see how I'm doing. How does he know I'm not "6 ft under" (and I don't mean the show, even though he's the one that started me watching the show a couple weeks ago - it's very good)? School started this week, but that doesn't mean that he couldn't have seen how I was doing and let me gripe a bit and then get back with his homework. Maybe I should text him "Hey, it's me. Now would be a good time to text me to make sure I'm still alive. (Nudge, nudge). That's in the NT Etiquette Handbook 101". But if I did that, it just wouldn't feel the same if he texted then.

When and how often do you Aspie guys and gals contact your friends?

I'm really terrible at contacting people. I kind of have friends (people I see once in a while that I get on with and quite like), but I rarely contact them. I wait until they contact me and then I always answer - unless I'm busy and I intend to answer later but sometimes forget, in which case the answer comes a day or so later. I do think to myself sometimes, 'I wonder how so and so is?' and I hope they are okay but I don't contact them. Or sometimes I just get so engrossed in something or depressed that I kind of forget about everyone and before I know it, a couple of months have passed.

Why not tell the guy you're sick, and would really enjoy it if you received a letter from him.

It would help you get better, because it would release healing endorphins.

If you have to ask, it just isn't the same. I'd feel like I was giving him an extra homework assignment. I go to the doctor today. I wouldn't be surprised if they say I have pneumonia. It's getting harder to breathe

Gosh, I hope you're okay! Is your appointment soon?

I know what you mean about having to ask. It's nice to have someone message you out of the blue because then you know that they're thinking of you. Maybe in this case a little prompting might be necessary. He may not have thought to contact you but that doesn't mean he's not concerned.

I may or may not be an Aspie, so my input might not be that valuable. But I am generally not the kind to initiate contact with people. I wait for them to contact me because I get exhausted with too much interaction and fear I may bother them.

If I know someone is in quite a bad state, I usually try to make an effort to support them. That's because I know from experience that it's nice to know that people care. But it also depends on the person -- if I know they already have a large support base then I might assume that my input wouldn't be necessary. They might be receiving 'too much' support as it is. So I guess for me, I first consider thoroughly what might be appropriate to do (or not do) before contacting someone.

I quite hate communicating with my friends via online methods--I don't know why, but it makes me feel uncomfortable and bored. I never begin a conversation with any of my real-life friends online/via phone and if they start one with me, I tend to ignore them or give an excuse.

I'm sorry you're feeling so sick.

How did it go at the doctor's today?

I hope all you have is acute bronchitis, rather than pneumonia.

Howdy Mr K. I just got back. I had to go to the ER after walking out to the car I got too short of breath. I didn't know it was that bad. My Ma found me and took me. I have pneumonia, left lung. Scares me because I'm never sick and I don't have any chronic illness and I don't smoke. The doctor doesn't know how I got it. They sent me home on antibiotics, z pack and a albuterol inhaler. They gave me back to back resp treatments and I was able to breathe better. I have a new armband that I can add to my jewelry collection - that has my name on it. I'm hoping this stuff works otherwise I'll have to be admitted for IV abx - that really scares me cause that would mean I have something really bad. I took some codeine and now trying to rest. I've never used a puffer before.

Just take care of yourself. Rest, relax. Watch TV, have fun on the Internet.

Pneumonia isn't as ominous as it sounds. It's not the greatest thing--but it's receptive to treatment.

I hope you're feeling better soon!

Thank you Mr. M. I'm trying.

I'm glad you are under a doctor's care and hope you feel better. It usually does not occur to me to initiate contact. My default setting is to just respond to people when they contact me.