Aspie blocked me on FB because I was talking to his friend

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Joe90
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08 Nov 2015, 10:21 am

An Aspie male friend of mine who I used to volunteer with and I speak to him on Facebook has blocked me because I was talking to his friend (who is female, and Aspie too). I never met her in person but she lives in my area and we just added each other as a friend on Facebook. I liked and commented on some of her posts, and she did mine, no harm done. Then I suddenly realized that he had blocked me from his friends list, and when I asked her why, she said that it was because I was talking to her, and she said that she doesn't know why he'd block me because of that. I still speak to her on Facebook like before.

Maybe my male Aspie friend got jealous because I was speaking to his friend on Facebook, but I don't see why, because I was still speaking to him on Facebook too. And I'm female too, so it's not like I'm a man trying to steal her, although I don't think they were dating anyway, as the girl was already in a relationship with somebody else.


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08 Nov 2015, 1:08 pm

Joe90 wrote:
An Aspie male friend of mine who I used to volunteer with and I speak to him on Facebook has blocked me because I was talking to his friend (who is female, and Aspie too). I never met her in person but she lives in my area and we just added each other as a friend on Facebook. I liked and commented on some of her posts, and she did mine, no harm done. Then I suddenly realized that he had blocked me from his friends list, and when I asked her why, she said that it was because I was talking to her, and she said that she doesn't know why he'd block me because of that. I still speak to her on Facebook like before.

Maybe my male Aspie friend got jealous because I was speaking to his friend on Facebook, but I don't see why, because I was still speaking to him on Facebook too. And I'm female too, so it's not like I'm a man trying to steal her, although I don't think they were dating anyway, as the girl was already in a relationship with somebody else.


I need to ask what kind of response you're expecting to get out of this?

Jealousy is not typically autistic. All kinds of people can act irrationally and in ways that are not always obvious.

Do you expect replies saying "Yep, that's because of his autism. Watch out for autistic people, they tend to do that".

Not suggesting you do, but I was unable to grasp exactly what kind of discussion you wanted to kick off here. Do you need advice on how to handle the situation?

Not trying to be rude or anything, just letting you know your post might be taken the wrong way due to the intent not coming through clearly, and that we've had similar posts before trying to frame autistic people in a negative light by being vague and not kicking off the discussion in a way that is easy to understand.



Joe90
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08 Nov 2015, 2:10 pm

Just thought I'd share it.

I wasn't relating jealousy to AS. In actual fact I was quite surprised seeing an Aspie male block a genuine friend on Facebook for barely no reason, being so he seemed the kind of Aspie who desired friendships, and I knew I didn't do anything wrong.

I was just pointing out that I hate being blocked on Facebook. Another guy blocked me too (he's an NT), but I think the reason for that was because he's always wanted to date me but I have found somebody else I really love.


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08 Nov 2015, 2:46 pm

I wouldn't loose sleep over it, he can't control you anyway.

Social media can sometimes create unrealistic perceptions. How do you know your friend is right anyway?



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08 Nov 2015, 2:56 pm

One of the reasons I'm not on facebook, is because it is is easier that social circle don't mix to simplify the social dynamic.

I have no desire to control anybody, I simply pick groups that are unlikely to encounter each other.

Facebook encourages people to befriend other people's friends.

That is fine as you know what you are getting into, however I can see how it could cause issues. Like if a minor associate, start taking interest in you friends and family.

The reason is, it is massive data mining exercise. It is gold dust for getting info on people.



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08 Nov 2015, 9:47 pm

That's Facebook for ya.

I wouldn't worry about it too much.


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08 Nov 2015, 9:59 pm

he sounds insecure


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Noca
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14 Nov 2015, 11:45 pm

My social circles do not mix. I purposely quarantine all friends from one another and only socialize 1on1. If for whatever reason s**t hits the fan, they explode in their own cell and the damage is confined to them without affecting the rest of my friendships. I hate group socializing anyway so there is no need to have any friends mix or know one another.

I don't use facebook either. It would be bad enough for my friends to be in the same social circle let alone my family members and relatives too.



catfluff
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19 Nov 2015, 2:52 pm

I thought you were male. That's a twist.

He must be really possessive or something.



Joe90
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20 Nov 2015, 1:02 pm

catfluff wrote:
I thought you were male. That's a twist.

He must be really possessive or something.


Most people on WP think I'm male because of my username. :oops:


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20 Nov 2015, 1:06 pm

No one can guess your friends reasoning - maybe ask him? His answer might not be what you expect.


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20 Nov 2015, 1:21 pm

Some girls removed me in the past too, apparently for no reason. Why they behave like that, none knows but the fortune-teller.



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20 Nov 2015, 2:35 pm

Peacesells wrote:
Some girls removed me in the past too, apparently for no reason. Why they behave like that, none knows but the fortune-teller.

Did they block you as well?

Maybe they felt like they had too many contacts and removed those who they personally knew the least well compared to their other contacts?



Peacesells
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20 Nov 2015, 6:16 pm

Uprising wrote:
Peacesells wrote:
Some girls removed me in the past too, apparently for no reason. Why they behave like that, none knows but the fortune-teller.

Did they block you as well?

Maybe they felt like they had too many contacts and removed those who they personally knew the least well compared to their other contacts?

Yes but they wouldn't block then.