How many bridges have you burned?

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It seems that I inevitably destroy every relationship I have. I've never had a girlfriend, and I finally lost my best friend. We had been friends since we were 7, and we knew each other so well. He had hardcore asperger's, and I probably have a mild form... obviously there are strong parts, but nothing like his. I never thought we'd drift apart, after we were so inseparable in our childhood. I suppose that relationship was burned by both of us, as computers took over his time (and the idiots that play it with him as well) and for a while, the same happened to me. I stopped playing on the computer all the time, and I tried to get our friendship renewed again, but he always gives excuses as to why we can't hang out. I think he is regressing extremely rapidly, as he has his own place and is always on Steam (the online store/community) nonstop if he isn't working. It's too bad too, we were really good friends, even if the pink elephant in the room was never addressed.

I had a friend out of high school for 4 years, and I burned that bridge on my own. For good reason perhaps. He was... kind of gay. At the time, I wasn't very open minded, and I wanted nothing to do with that, but I pitied him because I was the only friend he had that he seemed to be comfortable being close around. (how could I be so shallow, when I hardly had more) In the end though, it was a culmination of events on a school trip to Germany that caused me to end this one. He had been really uptight and bossy the whole time, and I just said "F it". I don' regret it, but I do owe it to him for getting me to try new foods.

There have been more, but none of them really hold the significance of those two. Not to be depressing or anything (as if it is helpable, how can one's life not be depressing when you can't connect with anyone) but I just can't keep a friendship for more than a period of 4 years. The first friendship I had (the one that lasted 14 years) kind of died after about 8, so... 8 years is the record.

Anyone else wanna share? Would be really... comforting? to know that I am not the only one who can't keep a friend.

4-8 years. I dont think you have a problem. Thats a pretty long time to keep a friend even for an NT.
as far as burning bridges goes, Ive burnt alot of them. Mostly for very good reasons, some because I'm old now, and I just cant deal with the drama anymore. The real question you should be asking yoursef (at least in mho) is what do I wish to gain out of these friendships? what kind of friendships do I want? and what kind of people do I want them with?

In my experience, its more important to have quality relationships (for however long they last) then It is to worry about keeping them. Ive had some of the best experience with some of the greatest people I have ever met. Some times the encounter only lasts for a matter of hours, sometimes a few years. But its the connection that matters. not the length or amount.

The idea of friendships change over time as well. when we are young friendships are mostly based on who lives closest with the coolest toys who invites you to their birthday party, as we get older we make conections based on things we have in common, favorite bands, videogames, sports, hobbies exc, and Adults have coworkers and collegues.

my point is, all connections are going to shift and change. It might be your fault, It might not, It might be curcumstance, or maybe you are just going in diffferent directions. Not everyone has the same type of friendships/relationships, some people chose not to have them at all. others, choose to have as many as possible. everyone is different, and all connection is different. (this goes for romantic relationships too)

be happy that you had a moment where you shared that connection. (for some people this is a very rare and precious thing). For however long you had it.

thats what really matters (IMHO)

Countless, though at the moment I can't be bothered to go into detail but I would probably have 400+ friends if I didn't "eliminate" them.

I've pretty much burned every bridge.

I would guess that the average length of time I've had a friend is probably just under 2 years.

Longest relationships were in elementary school (2nd-6th grade). Most of my friends in high school went military after graduation and never kept in touch. In college, well people come and go all the time in college. Since college, only had a few friendships, most of which ended because I felt that I was either being taken advantage of or was increasing left out/forgotten about.

I have burned a few bridges. My friendships usually end when I go off on one of my episodes where I drop off the face of the Earth for months at a time. It is in that period of time that most people just sort of move on without me. After that, friendships are usually never the same. This cycle happens all the time and it almost feel inevitable to me now.

On the brighter side of that, I do have 2 friends I have had since childhood that know I have AS and sometimes we don't talk for a year, and when we do, we pick up right where we left off as if no time has passed whatsoever. Those are the friendships that matter most to me anyhow.

lol this happens to me too

ive had different friends for each phase of my life, they only overlap in a handful of cases. im cool with that

OneStep, your avatar made me laugh so hard.

yours, well um, it didn't do much for me to be honest...

I'm kind of the same way. I didn't keep in contact with anyone from high-school after I graduated. A couple years later I was suffering from sever depression & I ticked off most of my online friends & lost contact with em. I got a job & didn't keep in contact with people when I switched to my 2nd job. About the only friend I have rite now is from that 2nd job. I lost contact with most everyone from my 3rd job to

i didn't burn any bridges, they just sort-of rotted away.

I've burned a few bridges. One with a guy in college, one with a man who didn't understand ASDs and one with an abusive girlfriend.

They seem to burn the bridges, metaphorically speaking. And I let it happen, especially if it's predictable in advance. I figure as all my friends get relationships and get married, losing everybody will be inevitable as they all switch into life patterns that are based on the tenet of relationship over friendship.

That's probably not for about five years, but that is dangerously close -- especially since one would think that an age like 25 is an age to see the world as opposed to settling into some sort of domestic relationship bliss.

all of them.

I would be an expert except I did most of them unconsciously

Bridges have been burned for various reasons. There were individuals in my life whom I thought were friends who turned out to be some of the most callous twats I've met.

Things change in people. They seem to ditch you when something fresh and better comes along in their lives. Their loss.

Same here. I'm more alone right now than ever.