Wanting only one best friend

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In a way I guess I never had any problems with "making friends" as per se, however I feel like I was just lucky to be in the right place at the right time to find the right types of people. Even then I still don't really get along with friends once I get close to them.

Many times, I have thought that if I could have one single best friend that would hang out with me all the time and do things together (not like a partner or anything, just purely platonic) everything would be so much better. My past relationships have failed due to the fact that they're the only people I want to do things with and I end up obsessing over it in a clingy way. I don't mean to but eventually everyone upsets me and cross my boundaries with changing in plans and things, especially in large groups.

So I guess the question is has anyone wanted only one friend instead of a lot of them?

I think quality is more important than quantity, but it's still good to have acquaintances.

Quality is good, quantity is not something I really think about as you're lucky if you have one good friend in this world.

I've always been the type to have one clearly defined best friend with whom I hang with constantly. This was true up through my mid 30s but life changes those sorts of things. But going all the way back to grade school I was like that.

Nothing wrong with that. One friend is infitely better than no friends.



And as other people said, quality is MUCH more important than quantity. To some extent I feel the same way. Well marriage is like that to some degree, best friend for life. Then it's expected you'll cling to them. Still need to deal with other people though.

I think meeting lots of new people, even if 99% of them will be gone in an hour, can be helpful. Meeting people from different cultures, religions, sexualities, careers, backgrounds, income brackets, etc. has made me into a more informed, worldly, tolerant person.

OP, I completely relate to this. My entire life has been a series of just wanting/having one friend at a time - I seem to be incapable of being attached to more than one person at a time. No one else is important if I have one friend I really like. Why would I need any other friends when I have this one person? I actually still can't understand why someone would need more than one friend at a time, and the thought of actually having and maintaining more than one at a time blows my mind.

It makes sense to me personally, if I can only focus on one thing at a time in other regions of my life, it's not surprising to me it holds true socially.

The only problem happens when the friendship with these people changes or passes for whatever reason, and then there's no one, and it's just uncertain waiting for the next one. For me it's very frustrating as well since like other interests, I am extremely particular about the people I am able to be interested in/find important, and they are extremely rare. Sometimes I wish I could like/get along with a broader range of people, but other times I remember I'm better off without trying to deal with them.

I'm exactly the same way, I have one friend who I'm really close with but other than that I don't really have any others and I don't feel as if I really need any. Besides the one I do have we're pretty much inseparable even though we've never met face to face (I live in england and he lives in florida). Hopefully I can make it out there at some point next year.

i feel as though this is pretty common. I am definitely a one-person person. I've definitely got other friends, but there's only one person who i want to tell stuff to and whose opinion i really care about. I know she has many people who she wants to tell stuff to and whose opinion she cares about, and i think it even annoys her at times that she's my one person even though she does understand me. Most non-AS folks like to have many best friends. I've just learned to come to terms with those facts... Im constantly working at talking to new people, being friendly, sharing and listening, finding the good in others, and trying to become more personal in new relationships, but deep down I know who my "person" is and always will be! I try to give her a lot of space so she doesn't feel smothered, but I'm happiest when I'm with her and could easily forget everyone else.